Bi-Polar Bear

Introductions

"For every face a story,
For every story a life full of events,
And for every event a moment of experiences and emotions"

Ah group, group was better then one on one or family therapist sessions because it was more a choice to share, plus I didn't need my family judging me.

Even though group was with a bunch of strangers sitting in a circle with people you know are judging each other about their life stories but I couldn't relate to any of the things they did to end up here like being a self harmer, being constantly bullied, doing stupid crap like running away or doing drugs for attention, but to top it of we had to sit with a therapist who think he's above all of us, I had too take some kind of counselling or I'd be locked away in a psych ward.

"Mr. Stewart" the counsellor said in gentle but somehow loud tone snapping me out of my train of thought, "Would you like to share anything with us?" it was more of a statement rather then a question so I replied "No sir, I don't wish to share anything but if I must I'd just like to say it's been nice hearing from you all its really inspired me to get through me own issues that I've been having" "Do you really mean that Mr. Stewart because telling from your sarcastic tone of voice it sounds like you don't and do you know the names of half these people?" he said I replied with a simple "No" he seemed quite pissed and decided move on to another person and as me back to my train of thought. Even though it had been about a seven months now I couldn't recall anyone's names, every session is the same we come in we sit in our circle surrounded by stupid and corny motivational posters talk although I did like the adorable cat poster, then after enough time talking about about how stupid posters and not needing to be here we talk about our lives well not me I'd didn't really speak just one answer replies most of the time and it's quite rare that I do speak a full sentence, I just sit and get caught up in my thoughts.

I get snapped out of my thoughts again as every gets out of their chairs and begins to walk out, I begin to get up and walk out as well I hear the words I was fearing I'd hear "Mr. Stewart can you come speak to me please?" one again another statement not a question, I walked over and said "What is it you'd like to speak too me about sir?" he answered "In the past seven months you've barely said enough words to make a paragraph, if you don't start sharing I'm afraid you won't be able to do group and go back to one on one counselling" "I guess but Sir can't you just let it go, I mean your getting payed so can't just say I'm getting better" I replied, "But your not getting better, I can't say your getting be if you're not and if your not getting better I don't get payed do you see my problem?" he said and I replied with a simple "Yes" and walked away.

I decided to walk home because I rather not spend a single moment with my family, so placed in my headphones and had taken a few detours around town then I decided to take the backtrack home it's more peaceful besides less people, it's not that I hated people I just feel uncomfortable around a lot of people so taking the backtrack home was more comfortable and besides it only had taken me a maximum of four hours mostly because I get distracted easily.

Once I had gotten home I went down to my room,(the house is set up to be two stories and the family sleeps up top but since the basement is pretty much like one massive room I sleep down their) turned on my PC and worked some of the home work I was set even though it's only nineth grade it's quite hard with all of the constant work we are set from all our teaches, around about 10pm I decided to give up and read a few comics then I decided to read a novel and put some music on in the background.

I eventually came to and the first thing I did was check the time it was only 1:49pm and my music was still playing gotta say my phone has great battery life. I had a quick shower then had brunch, I walked back down stairs to complete my homework because I had school tomorrow but it only had taken me around three hours. I eventually unlocked my phone to reply to some texts and to end the day I took my medication to be honest I don't if I was working because I was little slack when it came to taking my medication and by a little I mean a lot, at the most I'd have one day when I didn't take my medication rarely 3 days not that anyone notices.

*BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* my alarm screeched signalling it the start of a new week but it was last week till the end of semester and it wasn't even a full one either and since I had completed my midyear exams early because I'm a head of all my classes most of time, this week is going to be to easy.

Started with my normal early morning rituals shower, got dressed and brushed my teeth and left for school I didn't eat early in the mornings because it made me sick be this morning I decided to take some grapes to eat on the way to school, ten grapes precisely I liked to eat two at a time, I place one on each side then eat them and if I ever end up with one extra on I place between the top and bottom row of my middle teeth then bite down sending a half grape to both sides of my mouth.

I liked walking to school early in the morning because how peaceful it was and every morning I go to the specific class room in the east wing if the building awaiting the rest of my friends, I'd get to school normally at 7am, 8am at the latest and 6am at the earliest, the other reason I liked to get to school early was because it allowed me to get in the head space to complete assessment or home tasks I hadn't finished and their is something about the dead silence that would give anyone else the shivers but with me...I don't know it just felt nice to hear such a silence that not even a thousand cries could break it.

One by one each of my friends rolled in, the first one was Cameron he looked so tired with his short blonde hair all messy with no distinct style and the bags under his eyes where so dark you could almost lose yourself in them he doesn't seem like he has an ounce of energy one because the lack of emotion and two because the fact he is currently sleep under the desks. The second one to rock up is Lydia, she has always seems perfect at all times along with her hair, eyes and smile she was the physical embodiment of happiness, I was greeted with a kiss barrage and nots that she likes me it's just our relationship is very distinc plus she did it just make me uncomfortable in social situations or just whenever really. The next was Blue, we called her blue because of her hair as long as I could remember she's had blue hair so it seems fitting and it stuck no has ever called her by her actual name, Blue was the typical Goth girl in the fact she like to wear all black but wasn't really close to one because Blue wasn't all life is suffer deal she was just a dick to people who annoyed her which is fun. The last one to arrive is Blake, he was generally early almost early then me sometimes well when I'm late by my standards, Blake was...Blake is unreadable nothing really seems to phase him what so ever, but he was nice to everyone around at times.

Our group are the typical out casts, the nerds if you will but we don't find it offensive it's more if a compliment, we are probably the biggest nerds in town and even for miles. We loved comics, movies, books, TV series but we mostly liked all things from 80-90's.

The day started with home room as always, then first, second and third period passed by with ease then it was lunch. We all met in the same class room as we did in the mornings, it was the only place we could because everyone else through put school didn't really connect with anyone else. Most of our talks are about discuss the logic and the physics behind anime, superheros basically anything and we can talk about latterly anything like if cupcakes won the fist world war or justifying if being a penguin is a state of mind, other then that it was pretty much banter and burns but it was our way if saying we love each not matter how hard the burns hit.

It was almost the end of lunch then Blue said "Since its the week of the semester we should have a week long hang out sort of thing at my house next week, just us" we all agreed mostly because our jobs barely gave us any hours, plus it was a week at Blues house it's amazing so much space, so much art through out it was just perfect.