It Was a Cold Winter Night

Monday

   I faced the chill of upcoming winter as I exited the car and scurried into school. Running late as usual, I decided not to give a fuck and took my time. I tried my best to avoid eye contact as I walked, but it's hard. There's no where else for my eyes to point at. So making eye contact with people you hate and don't want to interact with sucks. They go on thinking that means peace and honestly I'm not one for that.

   I got to my locker and fumbled with the lock until I magically yanked it open. I looked to the side as I was shoving my bag in.

   "Hey Cliff."

   "Yo."

   We continued to chat as I grabbed my thing and as the Vice Principal yelled "COM'ON (insert name here) LETS GO." He does this every morning and honestly it annoying and it hurts my ears. Once he got by us he looked at us and didn't say anything and kept walking.

   "Still doesn't know our names."

   "It's always fun to look him in the eye as he walks past and doesn't know my name."

   "True."

   "Plus neither of us do sports or get in trouble. So how would he know?"

   "He been in our classes and have said our names."

   I pulled my things to my side and kept them rested to the curve of my hip. It's always funny thinking we're walking at the same pace because I'm short and take small steps while he's tall and takes big steps.

   Monday's go on and on. Not only is it basically the same routine everyday, it just seems worse on Monday. I totally feels Garfield's pain right about now. Every other hour went by either slowly or quickly. It finally became Honors English time and I was just about ready to die.

   The first thing is that I don't respect my teacher at all, and well, no respect equals I'm not going to do shit. So I just sat on my phone as everyone in the group chatted with whoever they say next to and I continued to sit alone and feel like shit. See there's this thing where I see the the five around that area are having fun and I'm not in any part of it. Kinda like I'm extra in the group. Like I could easily be kicked out the group and everything would be the same. You feel?

   So I sit here and stare at whatever I can and get majorly emo or rather sad. Once in a few days someone nice or chill will sit next to me and talk. Today is not one of those days. I don't know man, I guess I'm being ridiculous but that honestly how I feel when it comes to my friends.

   They do better without me.

   Ding ding ding

   It's lunch time. I guess I'm gonna say quiet and walk downstairs alone while feeling bad for myself like the shitty person I am.