Undying love

New life

Senior year 4 months later....

"Ava come on don't be such a baby" ethan said climbing up the steps "Ethan slow down you know I'm afraid of heights" I said praying to god I don't fall "Ava we have been going to this place for God knows how long you should be used to it" he said laughing "well I'm not" I said finally getting to the top "congrats you didn't cry this time" Ethan teased "shut up" I laughed looking out into the view memorized by the all the stars an lights and the beautiful sunset. "Still gets you every time" Ethan said smiling looking out at the view as well "yea I guess" I said laughing a little.

"It's our senior year we made it through high school" Ethan practically shouted out in exitment "yea we made it" I said giving him a weak smile then looking down at my feet "what's wrong?" He asked concerned "Grayson should've been here he loved this place" I said with tears brimming my eyes "Grayson is always with us he's watching over us" Ethan said trying to comfort me. "Bullshit Ethan" I said getting mad "well what do you want me to tell you huh Ava?" He said annoyed "I want you to say you miss him I want you to tell me a story of when he was here when we were all happy I want you to remind me of him I want you to remind me you always think about him that you still care" I said starting to cry "Ava... of course I miss him he was my brother- he 'is' my brother not a day goes by that I'm not reminded of him that I miss him that I think of what could have been if he was still here of wha-"he said getting cut off "of what could have been if I was never in your life's"I said with guilt laced in my voice "no do not do that you know I wasn't gonna say that I know it's not you're fault" he said in frustration "if you knew you would know that it is my fault if I was never with him if I never got into your life's he'd still be here he would still be your brother"I said "and he still is... It wasn't you're fault Ava it was that sick basterd that was supposed to be your father" "exactly!. It's my f-" i began but got cut off "no exactly why it wasn't your fault it was your father not yours and you shouldn't feel guilty cause you did everything you could an even though we couldn't get to Grayson I-it's ok..." He said with his last words beginning to sound more like a whisper "it's not ok eth if- if I just kept my da... That basterd alive long enough we would've found him" I said with warm tears cascading down my cold skin "no. Ava look he got what he deserved after all the hell he put you through, and you did exactly what anyone what have done." he said with a sympathetic look on his face but desperation laced in his voice wanting me to not be so hard on myself wanting so badly to know its not my fault and I want that to but, I can't have that what I have is guilt the kind of guilt that eats away at you an I deserve it because I could've done something I should've done something but I didn't even though I wanted to.

After a while of silence ethan finally spoke "hey let's not talk about this we are at our special spot looking at this beautiful view and we're seniors this is the end of high school an a fresh start for you for us" he said trying to lighten up the mood "ok thank you eth" I said giving him a small smile "aye we better go tommarow is the first day of school an we don't wanna be tired" he said getting up "yea" is all I said as we climbed down.

As we walked to my house we went to my backyard where the fence was since he lived right behind me we go through the door in the fence it was there When we moved here an that's actually how I met them. "Hey well imma go but first I need to tell you something" ethan said kind of nervous "what?" I asked "well Jack is gonna go to school with us now and he his also moving in the house in front of you so we will walk to school together" he said unsure of what I would say "really eth Jack is chill he-" "Johnson and.. Gilinsky" he cut me off "what the fu-" I started but got cut off by ethan again "Ava look I know you used to hate him but that was a long time ago he knows better he feels bad he knows how much of a dick he was an he actually wants to talk so you guys can be friends" Ethan said hoping I'd agree "fuck no Ethan I can give two fucks about him an him wanting to make things right" I said "Ava please" he begged "no Ethan he made me feel so worthless and even when I was crying he didn't care he told me everything was my fault that I'm just as bad as my da- as that basterd and I hate him I hate the way he made me feel I want nothing to do with that ass hole Ethan!" I practically yelled at him "Ava he changed, but I understand I'll tell him to just stay away but you promise that you will eventually try to give him a chance" he asked "I don't know eth" I said truthfully "well I got to go I'll see you tomorrow goodnight" he said walking over to his house "night I said walking inside to going to bed dreading tomorrow.