BACK AND FORTH-I

CHAPTER 4

                                                                        Chapter Four

                                                                        What's all This?

  Maria and I had been moved into our country home for just over a week. Maria adored the décor, especially the chandelier in the lime green dining room. She is polishing the brass 19th century Bell-type telephone when it rang. Startled, she almost dropped the delicate instrument.

       "4572, Maria speaking," she said, trying to hide her southern American accent with a posh, but phony, English country lady manner. "Oh, hello, Peter. Yes he's here, but in the shower." A few moments later Maria replaced the receiver and made her way to our shower room.

      "That was Peter, he asks if it is okay to come over in the morning and bring with him his friend, Bill, somebody-or-other. I said that it's okay and you'd call him back if it is inconvenient. He didn't want to be pulling you away from your computer and your writing, that is. Oh-woe is me, a widow to a semi-literate writer," she said, laughing.

  I'm fondling my testicles, wondering what use they were, when she called through the shower-room door. Not that that would have stopped her walking in on me as I reached for my haemorrhoid cream. It's time for bed, but on this occasion I slept fitfully. My mind is on the cellar and its contents. I gazed through the moonlit window and listened to the hooting of an owl perched in a nearby tree. Maria's breathing is shallow. She mumbled something, part of some dream, I guessed. The clock read 4:15.am. I  slid back into bed and dozed off, for the next thing I knew, Maria had brought coffee and a slice of toast to our bed.

      "Peter and Bill are down stairs, waiting for you. They are having a full breakfast, so you might want to shower," she said dropping a soft kiss on my forehead.

  I looked over to see the time is just after 10:30.am. I leaped out of bed and rushed to the shower, coffee in one hand and a towel in the other. I'm in and out of the bathroom like a flash of lightening. I dressed just as quickly and sped off downstairs. I wandered into the dining room to see Peter and Bill drinking tea and dunking their ginger-nut biscuits, whilst looking through the mad doctor's notes.

      "Good morning," I said, but I'm sure that my greeting doesn't sound sincere, for I noticed that Peter gave one of his 'who is a naughty boy' looks.

      "Anton. Might I introduce to you someone very special. This is Dr Bill Norris, KBE, professor of advanced physics, Lady Marigold-Gloves College, Oxford. Bill married Dame Hilda Baker, the late wife of Dr Aqua Regis, the inventor of my beautiful internal combustion water engine."

  I shook Bill's hand and smiled, genuinely pleased to meet a man who knew what advanced physics is about. We sat and chatted for a while, about mundane things, mostly. Then came the time for Bill to ask if he could see the laboratory in the cellar.

  I entered the cellar first, followed by Bill, then Peter, bringing up the rear.

      "Peter mentioned that the wall had been bricked up from the inside...how very curious. Tell me, Antony, are you sure there is no other exit?" asked Bill, politely.

 For a moment, I'm tempted to retort with some witty remark, but I decided against making any such comment to my guest.

      "Not as far as Peter and I could see. To be honest, we didn't search too well. It appears that the room does not have any niches that might harbour something as obvious as a portal, other than what is atop the staircase, Bill." The professor strolled slowly around the laboratory, being careful to stop and examine carefully plastered walls every foot or so, then at the contents of the laboratory benches and tables.