Light In The Darkness (Soudam Fanfic)

Chapter 4: Kiss and Make up

The breeder wallowed around in his room for the rest of the day, he ignored sonia's pleas to open the door to his cottage but he refused and just sat there staring at the ceiling. He was more alone now then he had ever felt, and he has been alone most of his life. He figured he would maybe go outside really late at night to go get his hamsters some food but for now he was getting eaten up by his own thoughts.

Souda pushed himself out of his bed that night, slipping his beanie on over his messily layered hair. He was determined to go talk to Gundam and apologize for being such an asshole earlier that day. He walked up to the breeder's door, knocking on it lightly.

The breeder got up, it was probably Sonia again he had to inform her to leave him alone. "Sonia, how many times to I have to repeat myself I want to be left alone, I'm not in the best moods." He talked through the door now sighing and turning around walking back towards his bed.

"Gundam, it's not Sonia, it's me... " Souda said awkwardly. "You don't have to open your door and let me in if you don't want to, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to upset you." He said.

The breeder got back up and opened the door, he looked like a mess but he needed to see souda. "Oh, hello souda...I'm sorry to bother you. It's alright I'm fine, no need to worry." He smiled ready to break into a million pieces he did not know why but the breeder was weak around the mechanic, in other words the mechanic made him weak, her felt open and calm around him.

Souda moved his hand up and touched Gundam's face. It wasn't all that gentle though, however. It was more like he was examining it than caressing it. "You don't look fine." He inched his face closer. "Have you been c-crying?"

The breeder nodded. "I guess some tears escaped from my eye earlier, but it's nothing just alergies. Nothing to worry about I assure you." He smiled slightly grasping the other man's hand on his face. "I'm sorry I'm causing you trouble kazuichi." He responded.

Souda shook his head. "It's not allergies, Gundam. I can tell that you were crying pretty hard." He huffed.

The breeder sighed. "Yes I know.. I just didn't want you to think I'm weak for doing so, I also didn't want you to worry. I mean this is new for me too I do not cry often. I was just very upset that I had hurt you." He replied.

Souda looked at Gundam and sighed. "You didn't hurt me, Gundam. And crying doesn't make you weak." He tried to assure the man. "Crying makes you human, even though you don't really think you're all that human, do you?"

The breeder nodded. "I realize I might actually be a human but I always felt out of place as one, therfore I have made myself half demon half angel in order to make myself more of an outcast so people wouldn't get near someone like me. I don't deserve what I am, I don't deserve friends. I have decided that a long time ago. But here I am with Sonia as my best friend and made other friends at this island too, but just like the rest of my life good things leave, and in this case my friends kill each other and I have to watch. It's quite nerve racking to comprehend the hope slowly dying in everyone's eyes. And I'm no different, but there is some hope left and that's in a certain person for me, whenever and whatever happens having thoughts of them, help me through my demons so to say. That's why I fell for them and not miss sonia." He sighed finally glad to get that off his chest. "And with that I thank him dearly." He smiled at the other male happy he got all that out of his system.

Souda stood in front of Gundam, looking at him in pure surprise; that was quite a speech he'd just delivered. He wasn't sure what to say, but he simply allowed what was on his mind to come out. "You said he... who are you talking about, Gundam?"

The breeder froze and looked up at the other male. He panicked what if souda didn't like that Gundam liked guys what if he hated him now. "Oh just one of the guys on this island..." he trailed off blushing not sure what to say due to the fact the guy who he was speaking of is right in front of him.