For The Better Or Worse? {Book 2} [Xiuhan/Lumin]

Chapter 2: Let's go

Xiumin's pov:

I opened my eyes and I regretted it right away. I think I cried too much for my eyes to feel like they got no rest. I don't even remember how I got home. I look at my side and Chen was laying on the edge his body on a chair while his upper body rested on the bed. I might of had overdone it. I wonder if Chen followed me.. If he did then I'm ashamed at what I did but at the same time my beating heart still longed for Luhan's touch. For Luhan's smile and especially for his warm hugs.

I might of had not remembered much from what happened but one thing is for sure, I'm not in the clothes I used to be in before and it was already the morning. Chen was still soaking wet and his hair looked almost dry but not quite yet. I moved out of my soft warm blue blanket but didn't know what to do. For sure he saw what I did. He probletly took me back to my house and got all wet because of me. He is probletly going to get sick and it's all my fault. I just wish sometimes that he didn't care so much for me. He would do greater things if he didn't like me.

"Chen" I whispered quietly while nudging him. His eyes slowly flutter open to the brightness of the room and he blink a couple of times to get out of his sleeping state. "Hm?" He hummed and stretched his arms, lifting them in the air and exposing a little of his stomache. I looked away awkwardly yet attracted by the sight. "I.. I hum.. You know.. Do you need other closes? You should go take a warm shower. I'll get you something to eat while your doing so." I said and walked away without hearing his answer. Even if he didn't do it I would make him do it. I don't want him risking his health for me.

I close the door behind him and went to the kitchen and started to prepare warm soup, thinking of the things that could happen now. How I used to live my regular life before Luhan came in but just thinking about his name hurt. It hurt so bad that my chest burn from sadness. I miss you. Those are the words I always want yo tell him. The once I always thought in my mind even when he was alive but know I can't say. I regret not telling him that but I can't do anything about it. I have to deal with it and move on.

Once the soup was done I open the door and came in with the food. Running water was coming from next door and I set the tray down on the night stand and picket out clothes that would fit Chen just right. I grab an extra towel in case he needed one and open the door that wasn't locked. I came face to face with Chen in a towel revealing his v line and tone abs. I somehow felt embarrassed from not realizing that he was done and changing but after that I didn't feel anything. No fluttering in my heart, and no perverted thoughts. Just pure embarrassment.

I stare down and I felt like my thought went dry. "He-Here are the clothes.. I'm sorry for interrupting.." I said about to leave but Chen grab my wrist and made me face him. "It's fine Xiumin. Don't worry about it. I just want you to know that it's fine if I have to show you this side of me just for you to start liking me." He brought me in close and kept talking very seriously. "You know I like you but yet I know you don't feel the same way. I will be willing to only be friends with benefits if it means feeling your touch for a few minutes. It doesn't have to be much. I don't care if you break my heart and stump on it. I know that one day you will like me the same way I like you." He said and I studied his face.

His face was dead on serious and his eagle eyes burn into mine with a passion I couldn't look away or say anything. Our closeness was a little uncomfterabl yet assuring and I wanted for him to hug me. For him to do anything. I just wanted this feeling in my heart to go away. His wet hair had little droplets of water coming down to his tips and falling onto his face making him look more attractive than he is. His eyes were dark and determine and he lean forward and brushed his lips against mine until we weren't separated at all. He searched my lips for anything. For a respons and I kiss back. I needed to feel something else. I had to get over this even if I ment I was going to break Chen's heart in the process just to satisfy what I want.