Say You Love Me

#4 "Do what makes you happy."

                                 She's here.
I turn my doorknob, seeing an angel, clutching onto her phone. Smiling big as we meet eye to eye. She pushes the door open even more, immediately jumping into my arms. I instantly hug her back, her sweet fragrance fills my nostrils. Angelica always smelled so nice.

"Hey."

Her soft voice says, pulling away from our embrace.

"Hey."

I crack a small smile, she tucks a hair strand behind her ear. She grabs my hand, leading me to my living room. We both sit down next to each other.

"I'm sorry for not being here. Brian and I have a lot going on. I wanted to tell you about something.."

She looked afraid, as if she's been hurt emotionally. I become solicitous to what's happening, gently I placed my hand on top of hers. Squeezing lightly, she eased up a little.

"Shawn.. I feel like I'm falling in love with Brian."

     I feel my heart tear. Those were the words I never wanted to hear. Not once in my life did I want her to tell me she's fallen in love. I placed a fake smile on my features, hoping she'd not notice my eyes watering. Luckily, she didn't.

"That's such great news, Angie! Why do you seem so scared?"

She bows her head down.

"I just.. I don't want to jump into something so scary. I don't wanna go through heartbreak. I don't want to experience all of those emotions as of right now. I'm afraid that he'll leave, cheat, or do something wrong in spite of me."

She croaks out, I see tears stream down her beautiful cheeks. I use my thumb to wipe away her tears, fücking shït man. I place my hand on her side, she obliged to my touch by cuddling into me. I softly hum one of my songs I've written, memories.

"Angelica it's okay to feel that way. There's no way we can go around these feelings. Love is something that is both beautiful, and horrific. We never know what the future will hold for us, and it's harder to predict what will happen when we fall in love. It's scary, believe me, I know.

    But we take that risk for them because they're worth it. If you truly love him, you're placing a gun in his hands, pointing towards you. You are trusting him enough that he won't pull the trigger. You give him the opportunity, but you just hope he won't choose to do it. You love him, Angie.

      You've never been this way with anyone before. And if you want my opinion, I say go for it. Stay with Brian. Love him until you grow old together. Do what makes you happy, and if he makes you happy.. I say go for it."

She sniffles, lifting her head up from my chest. She smiles warmly, excited for what's to come. You're in love with someone else. The love of my life loves someone else.

"Thank you, Shawn. Seriously."

She hugs me again, my chin resting on her head. We rock back and forth in each other's arms.

I'm gonna miss you Angelica, more than anything, or anyone.