The Girl and the Unicorn

The Girl and the Teapot

"If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things."

Rene Descartes

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"I have a meeting with Reverend Holyster," the girl told the receptionist.

Until recently, she just had to knock on his door in the Intelligence Department to see her boss. However, since his accession to the Hierarch office, the old man was now one of the forty-two leaders of the Revered Church.

She dreaded this meeting. Recently, all of her discussions with her superior had led her to complex and strenuous missions. Though she was a proud and efficient Intelligence officer, the spy life started to weight on her shoulders. She was at this stage where all her female friends had already settled with husband and kids...

Since her return to Earth after her last mission, the girl had been drowned in reports and meetings with her superiors and other departments of the Church of Her Holy Pinkness. The discovery of sentient life on Venus had cast unrest in the Faith, thus threatening the World stability and peace.

There was a conservative branch, in the heart of the IPU's Holy Home, that didn't acknowledge the Plant of Venus as part of the Great Invisible Creation, even if they showed signs of intelligence, communication and social organization. They were still plants, however, which was the basis for those extremists to reject their existence. They doomed these new Life forms to the Great Pile of Manure, where any and all followers of the Purple Oyster of Doom shall end their miserable lives. Or so said the ones considering themselves those self-appointed "true Believers".

The girls just thought of them as a crazy bunch creating more trouble than anything. She feared that the excitation and unrest built due to the discovery on Venus would lead to new Crusade like actions, as it happened in the twenty-second century.

At this time, wars of religions were worldwide spread. Humankind was doomed to extinction. Or at least, men were in their way to destroy their planet. Religion was banned, to avoid conflict, but this didn't solve anything. Until a group of scientists rediscovered ancient texts showing a religion of cohesion and consistency.

Nowadays, the Holy Church of the Invisible Pink Unicorn was the dominant religion and the worldwide government. The One and Only. However, there were still some people not believing in Her Great Invisibility, May Her Hooves Never Be Shod. There were still non-believers and theists, although, those weren't a real threat to the peace and stability. The problem was more coming from the heretics. The colanders wearer. Those damned Space Pirates...

"The Reverend is waiting for you, Miss Martha."

So, for this mission she would be Martha, the girl thought. Her anonymity was part of the job routine. Her name changed often. One for every new job. One for every new date. It didn't help much for her social life, but she was devoted to the sacred work of chasing and eliminating space pirates and pasta worshippers.

Now that the old man was a Hierarch, she wondered who would be taking his position at the head of the Intelligence department. There were a number of sneaky men she could think of. However, she hoped none of these would be her new boss, as she didn't like their deceitfulness, nor their underhanded method. Some would say these were what made them good spies, but she always thought one could be good at this job while remaining true and faithful. A bit of a naïve view, probably; her leitmotiv nonetheless.