The Joys And Pains Of Writing Fanfiction

Chapter Six - The Dilema

"You have to meet with them!" Becca insists.

"Shhh!"

I look around making sure no one heard her. The last thing I need is for someone else to find out that R5 wants to meet me.

"No, I don't." I reply quietly. "Wattpad won't give out my information, if they do I will sue their ass so quick their heads will spin."

"Why don't you want to meet them?"

I look right into Becca's eyes. "What if they don't like me?"

"Why wouldn't they like you?"

"I'm sure I'm not what they are use too," I mumble, pushing my tray away.

"Evie, this is your dream come true. This is every single one of your stories coming to life. What's stopping you?"

That's a great question. So what is stopping me? I didn't know for sure. All I know is I don't want to do it.

"What if you meet them in my place?" I suggest.

"That's insane!" Becca exclaims.

"No, it isn't. I'll go with you, you can just be me. You know my stories. This could work."

"That's a crazy idea!"

The bell rang.

"Come home with me after school and we can discuss it more."

"Fine. But I think you..."

"Don't say it," I look around and see Hailey and Kaitlin walking to their next class. "Here."

Becca shakes her head her hair bouncing from side to side. "I'll see you in seventh period."

I watch Becca walk away. She's not happy with me but I can convince her to do this for me. We'll both go and meet them. It'll be all right.

The warning bell rings and I realize I'm still standing in the hall in front of the cafeteria. If I don't move I'm going to be late for chemistry. I head down the hall and up the stairs.

"Why don't you want to meet them?"  Becca's words echo in my ears.

The truth is I'm afraid. I'm afraid they won't like me, I won't be what they expect. I can't live up to their expectations. I have such a crush on Riker, what if he didn't even look at me twice? What if they want to meet me to make me stop writing stories about them? What if they hate my stories? The fact is my self esteem sucks and even though I think it'll be ok, something inside says no, it won't.

I enter the class room just as the final bell rings.

"Glad you can join us, Miss Jackson," Mr. Enders says.

I quickly take my seat and pull out my notebook and Chemistry book.

Mr. Enders wastes no time and jumps right into his lesson.

***
"Why can't you do this?" Becca asks again.

"I just can't," I say.

Becca shakes her head, she just can't wrap her head around my reasonings. We've been arguing about meeting R5 for twenty-five minutes.

I shrug my shoulders. "If you don't want to go in my place, I'll just tell them no."

"Really? You would pass up a chance to meet your celebrity crush just because your insecurities are going crazy?" She challenges.

I nod.

"I'll do it," Becca mumbles.

I throw my arms around her and hug her tight.