BROKEN

Hotel Room Revelations

The next morning my mother was already making phone calls to her sister and mother.
 
"Come meet us at the hotel hooyo and I'll tell you everything you want to know. It's way too much to explain over the phone." I overheard my mother say on the phone. I was laying on the bed and eating the breakfast that we ordered through room service. My mom must have been really stressed, she hadn't touched a single thing on her plate.
 
"Hooyo you should really eat something you haven't ate since yesterday morning."
 
"I'll eat once ayeeyo gets here Warsan." she said with her cell phone still held up to her ear. "I know you're angry hooyo but I really need you here right now." she said into the phone. I reached over and grabbed her plate and began to shove the french toast and eggs into my mouth. Luckily, I had a neverending appetite, I could always eat. My phone vibrated, it was Tasneem.
   
"Are you okay, we haven't talked in days..you didn't even tell me how reuniting with your dad went."
 
"Yeah, I'm fine just busy with family stuff." I told her, yet another lie.
 
"Oh okay good sooo how did it go with your grandma."
 
"It went fine she's really sweet and I look a lot like her."

"Thats awesome lol I can't wait to come over and meet her..when can I btw?"
   
"Ummm I'll let you know but you know how strict my dad is he doesn't like having people over so I'll let you know when it's a good time."
 
"Okay np call me tonight?"
   
"Sure." I replied, trying my best to cut the conversation short. My phone vibrated again and this time it was Fuad calling. I had to answer. "Hooyo I want to go downstairs and make coffee is that okay?" I asked. She waved her hand at me while she was on the phone, signaling that it was okay. I left the room and called Fuad back.
 
"Hey there beautiful!"
 
"Hey Fuad how are you? How's the college life?"
 
"It's boring without you, I wish we were in the same grade so that we could have gone to NYU together."
 
"I don't know, .are you sure that you would want me there?"
 
"Yeah of course, why wouldn't I?"
 
 "You seem to be having fun with the girls on campus.."
 
"Why are you always doubting the love I have for you Warsan?"
 
"I'm not but even if I was I would have logical reasons to Fuad. All I see are pictures of you online and snaps and videos of you spending time with other girls. It's hard to even get a reply out of you and when I do you seem distant and throw compliments at me without ever having an actual conversation with actual substance. I've kept quiet for way too long Fuad..I just feel like you're never taking us seriously."

"Damn it Warsan you always have a problem with me lately! I got into a summer engineering problem and you pretended to act happy for me until I actually left! I've made it clear that I love you and only you I wish you weren't so damn hardhead!" he yelled in my ear. I was fighting back tears. He had no idea how my life has just been flipped, he had no idea how bad I was hurting. I didn't call him to fight, I called him because the only person I wanted to tell my problems to was him. I wished he'd never left, I missed him and I missed the way he used to treat me. I remember the day he told me he was leaving.
 
"I have good news and bad news babe." he said as we swung on the swings in the park behind our school. It was after school hours so nobody would catch us together.

"Good news first." I said.
 
"I got into the engineering program." I jumped off the swings and grabbed both of his hands.
 
"Baby that's so exciting!" I exclaimed. "I can't wait to meet you at OSU in a year. We'll have so much fun on campus together."
 
"There's still bad news."
 
"Okay, what is it?"
 
"It's not in Ohio."
 
"Then where?"

"New York, I got into NYU Warsan." he said softly.
 
"Wow, that's awesome. I'm so proud of you!" I pretended to be excited.
 
"Are you really?" he asked puzzled.
 
"Yeah this is a dream come true for you. Now all we have to do is make this summer the most special time of our lives! And then I'll apply to NYU and join you and we can be together again."

"I have more bad news Warsan."
   
"Oh no what else?"
 
"I got into an early action summer program, so I'll be leaving in a few weeks."
 
"What? How about graduation?"
   
"I'll have to miss it and I'll be super busy these next few weeks because I have to get two months of work done so that I can pass these classes."
 
"But what about me?"
 
"I'll miss you most of all beautiful." he looked up at me and saw tears welling up in my eyes. He grabbed me and held me for a few seconds and then held my face in his hands.
"I'll text you all day and call you everynight. We'll videochat until you get sick of me and I'll come visit on every break, it will be like I never left Warsan. You'll apply in a year and you're a genius, the smartest person I know honestly you're so brilliant so you're guaranteed a spot." this didn't stop my tears from flowing. He wiped them and kept talking "I won't replace you if that's what you think, trust me you own my heart. I will never love a girl even half as much as I love you. You have nothing to worry about beautiful. Let's just make these next few weeks special okay?"
 
"Okay." I said through sniffles. "I don't want you to think I'm not happy for you, I really am. I just know how much I'll miss you."
   
"I'll miss you even more and I love you beyond words. We can make this work princess, we can do this." He said encouragingly. He leaned in and kissed my forehead, I looked up at him and stuck out my lips like I always did when I wanted a kiss. We kissed a lot throughout a relationship, but something about this one was different. It was deeper and passionate, the kind that leaves you wanting more. I was hoping that it wouldn't be our last.

"I'm sorry Fuad. I've just been having a rough few days." I said into the phone after thinking about the promise he had made me.
 
"Why what's going on princess? Is it about your dad?" he asked.
 
"Well yesterday when we went to the air-"
 
"Come on Fuad let's go! We've been waiting outside for half an hour."        I heard a girl say in the background.       
"Uhh, sorry I can't talk right now I'll call you later tonight." The line went silent. I tried to fight back my tears as hard as I could but nothing could keep them from flowing. The stress of my family situation on top of how Fuad had been acting had turned me into an emotional wreck. I cried out all my tears and wiped my face off in the bathroom downstairs to hide the evidence of my tears. I went back up to our room and overheard a phone conversation with my mom and aunt.

"He knew what he was getting into." she said into the phone. And what I heard next had changed everything I had ever believed prior to that moment. For the first time ever, I felt my heart shatter in my chest. My breathing sped up rapidly and I was sweating profusely. I held my hand to my chest and sank to the floor in complete and utter shock. This feeling was beyond any pain I had ever felt, this was stronger than anything Fuad could have ever made me feel. I was not the biological daughter of my father and I was not the biological daughter of my mother. I was adopted.