The New Babysitter | [In Process]

Chapter 15: Worse than I imagined

The breeze softly flew through the hallow curtains, brushing over the windowsill gently, passing through the fresh scent of freshly cut grass and blooming flowers from outside. The sunrays fell between the gaps of the almighty trees in the backyard and spilled over our hands and the soft sheets pressed down under our weights. The small flower placed neatly on the windowsill brought more colour and life into the room, allowing our minds to fill with such happy thoughts that I couldn't imagine thinking a year ago. This is the type of peace and calm I wanted for so, so long.

We stayed there for a while, just staring, admiring, not only each other and our features but our surroundings. I commented on her soft hair and she talked about the glow in my blue-filled eyes that the sun brought off. I said about how her socks were so fluffy and cute and how her shorts looked vintage and she admired my ripped black skinny jeans and my cacti shirt that was tucked into them. She complemented my eyeliner and I complemented her whole fucking face, because damn.

Then there was a silence where we admired the view outside my window. The overflowing garden with the green leaves heaving in the wind and the pink and white and yellow flowers decorating the further parts of the garden neatly. We turned our attention to the inside, how my room looked so simple yet interesting. The colourful books decorating the shelves, the eight or nine unlit candles standing everywhere, the older birthday cards from last year, the soft music playing through the speakers.

We talked a lot. We talked about vacations and future plans, about spontaneous road trip plans and running away to get into trouble. We talked about being the bad kids for once and not giving a shit. We talked about how we've been friends for so long and how we didn't want that to change. We talked about how happy life was and how finally we felt free. We talked about writing books, writing music, drawing, playing music, singing, dancing, anything that we had motivation for and, right now, we wanted to do it all, we wanted to conquer the world.

As far as dreams go, we had it all planned. We had our little ideas of which we hoped to become reality plus we had the motivation to start doing most of them now. But we just laid there. Peacefully, softly and sweetly. Just laid there on my bed, our eyes fixed on the ceiling and our hands laid on our own stomach, playing with our hands or shirts. We had all these plans, but we laid there and did nothing.

It was still amazing to just do nothing but stare at the ceiling and listen to the calm playlist that I've picked out before, but why didn't I just do everything I wanted to start so bad? I could have gotten somewhere. What would happen that night would get to me nonetheless, but maybe, just maybe, what he said a few days later, maybe that wouldn't have mattered as much. If only I managed to change my life around enough to escape him, perhaps I wouldn't be suffering as much as I am. But I didn't know that then. I just laid there and did nothing. I was making a big, big mistake in my life by doing nothing then, and I regret that so bad.

'On a scale of one to pizza how hungry are you?' asked Alice, playing with the ring on her finger from her boyfriend. It was so damn shiny, and I bet expensive too. They've been together for three years already and it's only the first year of college, even though they go to different ones.

'Two pizzas.' I responded and as soon as my voice went to her head, her body lifted from the white and grey sheets and grabbed her phone from my desk. Her eyes scanned her screen as her fingers clicked gently as she typed in her passcode and most likely went on the website to a pizza place.

After a few more moments of clicking and waiting for the page to load, she finally asks, 'What kind?'

'Cheese. A lot of it. All of it. Every kind they have.' I responded. It was a thing I did apparently, and I hadn't really noticed until I caught Alice talking about me to someone else and mentioned that I say a few very short sentences and use a special tone and the things are say are just so funny to her. It's always nice to know that your friend talks positively about you, I didn't even realise I did it until I heard her say it. Weird.