Helloo guys !! Sorry that this chapter took so long, school has just been kicking me a bit and now I'm sick and it reeeeally sucks but here is the chapter woo!!
For those who read other fanfic ‘Through Jealousy’ I am writing a sequel so please go check that out :) it’s called ‘Through Love’ (creative I know) hahaha umm but yeah please …
And if you were reading Cacophobia I'm putting that on hold for a bit, I just want to finish this first basically :)
I mentioned earlier that I was sick, I edited this but it might not seem like it was edited properly sorry for that.
I don’t even know who to dedicate this to because so many of you have been awesome to me this week so thanks everyone!! If you comment on Through Love first I’ll dedicate next chapter to you ;) (just tell me that you're reading this by putting *8steps* at the end of your comment) but if none of you do then best comment on here gets it. (im sorry if this feels demanding idk)
VOTE, COMMENT, FOLLOW, SHARE <3
Anyway I’ll shut up now, please enjoy :) xx
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Chapter 4
STEP 5
Harry’s POV
This step was definitely one of those scary ones. To be honest I wasn’t completely sure I wanted to do it, but it was one of those that you had to do. I was quite worried about how Niall would react, I knew that he would be completely against it and probably wouldn’t even want to do it.
In all honesty the next 3 steps would be the hardest for me and probably would be even harder for him. I loved Niall as a friend, he was my best friend after all and I certainly didn’t want to push him too far so I decided that I would just tell him all the last steps at once and hopefully he wouldn’t freak out too much.
Today instead of bursting through the door like the usual I actually knocked and waited for a response. I tried to take deep breaths but all it did really was make me go into a panic attack. He was going to be so mad I know it.
“Harry I can hear you breathing, come in.” I twisted the door handle and walked him with my face covered hiding my blush. “Sorry” I muttered softly. “So what's wrong, please just spit it out.” I looked up and raised an eyebrow, wondering how he knew that. “I’ve known you for over 10 years, you know, I can read you like an open book.” He smirked as he answered my unasked question.
“If I tell you what I’m thinking you might hate me so I really don’t want to but I guess I actually have to ask or say it out loud.” He laughed. Umm … well that is definitely not what I was expecting. “Harry I’d never hate you, as in ever, I feel like you’ll probably hate me before I can reciprocate those feelings.”
He used some tone that I hadn’t heard before and I really couldn’t distinguish what emotion he was using. “Okay so maybe I'm more on the embarrassed side and I know you that you’ll probably laugh or be disgusted.” He sighed. “It’s fine just spit it out, then you’ll feel better after.”
I took a deep breath before saying it all at once I guess. “Okaysoforthenextthreestepsimgettingatattooneedtokissyouandmaybedosomethingsexualwithyou” Niall looked at me dumbfounded. “What?! Can you repeat that, and slower this time.” I made sure to focus on a pattern behind him and chose to rephrase my words. “Umm so step 5 is getting a tattoo, step 6 I kinda have to kiss you and for step 7 I kinda have to do something sexual with you umm.”
I wasn’t brave enough to look at him but I assumed that he was freaked out. It had been like 5 minutes and he hadn’t said anything. Shit! I knew that he would be mad or disgusted. When I finally gained the courage to look up to see him, he was a wearing a confused facial expression.
“Fuck umm I'm sorry Niall, I should go and yeah I understand if you never want to speak to me again okay umm…” I stood up and started making my way to the door. “No Harry wait!” Niall shot up and met me before I reached the only exit in this room filled with awkward tension.
I stood waiting expectantly, what could he possibly say, did he really want to humiliate me even more? “Okay Harry, look, umm I don’t think I can do the last things with you. I mean it must be special because it will be like your first experience and you should do it with someone you love and I know you don’t feel that way about me and yeah, I'm more worried about you and like what if you regret it after, and what if it will affect our friendship and-”
I cut Niall off because I couldn’t listen to anymore. “Niall, I love you, I mean like in a friend way you know, and I trust you and that’s important to me.” I blushed before I continued because I was about to admit a few things now.
“I haven’t even had my first kiss yet and I'm 18, I’ve never done anything sexual with anyone and I don’t want to be bad at it when I do eventually do things like that. I mean I'm not even talking about going the whole way …. Just near there. I know I’m asking for a lot but it would mean so much if you would say yes.”
I again couldn’t look up at him because I had poured like three quarters of my heart out to him and I didn’t want it to come back and slap me in the face. I heard Niall sigh. “If it means that much to you … I’ll do it.”
“It’s really fine if you- WAIT! You’ll do it?!? Oh my god thank you Niall!!” I turned back to him and hugged him as tightly as I could. “You know I love you so I’ll do it” he said as he hugged me back. I couldn’t believe he would do it!! I was happy and I realised in that moment that he would always be there for me, I was so grateful for him.
“Okay now let’s go get my tattoo.” Oh trust me, I hadn’t forgotten about that. “So what does a tattoo have to do with the steps and what are you getting anyway.” Now is where he would probably laugh.
“Umm I'm a little on the good side and I mean everyone loves a good bad boy don’t they? So I'm getting a star, I’ve always liked them and one day I think it will have a special meaning and I'm also getting a clover, for luck.” At the last one I heard Niall take in a sharp breath but smile at me anyway. “Sounds cool I guess.”
As we walked out of the store I smiled at the sight of one of the black strips covering my skin. I had done it, I had gotten those tattoos but I couldn’t have done it without Niall holding my hand the entire time. Today I lied to him, the clover was for him, I just didn’t know how he would react so I didn’t tell him. One day he would find out but that day wasn’t today.
STEP 5 - COMPLETE
Niall’s POV
I'm a terrible person and I'm going to end up in hell, sitting VIP next to Satan. Harry asked me today if I would be okay with doing ‘sexual’ things with him and I agreed. I was taking advantage of him and I knew it, but I was just so greedy and wanted him so I gave in. One day he will probably find out and hate me but that day isn’t today.
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DUN DUN DUNNNN … that was a tad dramatic.
Okay so something important I want to throw out there, take not how Harry is barely referring to Louis anymore … *hint* *hint*
What do you think about the next few steps?? Things are going to be heating up I tell you ;)
What do you think of Harry’s tattoos??
Remember if you comment on Through Love first I’ll dedicate next chapter to you ;) (just tell me that you're reading this by putting *8steps* at the end of your comment) but if none of you do then best comment on here gets it. (im sorry if this feels demanding idk)
VOTE, COMMENT, FOLLOW, SHARE <3
