Shae's Random Rants

Organized Chaos

When you, the tenager-who-never-picks-anything-up-off-the-floor-unless-they-really-have-to-and-cleaned-their-room-in-a-half-hour-hurry-the-day-before-a-rental-inspection-during-the-most-stressful-point-in-the-school-year has the cleanest room in the house, it gets you thinking.

How the hell did I do it?

Organized chaos, my friend. Organized chaos.

You see, my room may be chaotic, but it's a vary practical form of chaos.

Dirty clothes in a pile in that corner, blankets on the floor, things to throw out in that section, clean clothes folded and piled on that bench.

I subconsciously organize my room.

All I have to do in the cleanup is pick up an armful of things, and carry them over to the washing machine, or bin, or dresser.

...And then there's that pile-of-things-you-never-know-what-to-do-with that you just throw down.

That's the rest of the half hour.

Well, that and the random tissues and scraps of paper lying everywhere...

But with a quick sweep of the counter those are gone too, and the room is eerily clean.

Then you go out to the kitchen and it's still covered in dirty-dishes-piled-almost-as-tall-as-you, and the armchairs are filled with washing-to-be-put-away, and the bathroom bin is overflowing...

And by you, I mean me.

Because this happens a lot.

Every rental inspection it's the same.

Same routine, same outcome - just different music.

Because let's be real here, who can clean anything without music?

Please excuse me while I get another throat lozenge, as I am currently sick.

Right, now where was I?

Oh, yes. Organized chaos.

Organized chaos is why whenever your mother-acting-like-figure walks into your room and makes a comment such as "Oh my, it's a mess in here, however do you find anything?" You just shrug and continue to find the thing you were looking for.

Far left corner under the dirty socks.

It's why whenever someone moves something you feel lost, and don't know where to look.

Because in your mind,  socks don't go in the right draw, they go in the left side of the room, near the bedside table but above the book-pile.

If anyone moves the socks, you suddenly don't know where to look.

My stepmother for instance, changes her mind about how small things around the house should be every month or so - and so my father and I are constantly wondering where something is.

Last time we checked icing sugar was near the flour, but now it's near cake decorations? When did that happen?

Once we came home and she had moved the art supplies and games to the other side of the house without telling us. The next day she moved the games back, but kept the art supplies in their new home.

Three weeks later (though it felt like three days) she switched the draws around. Bottom was no longer paints, that was now the top draw.

Honestly, I don't know how we find anything with her around. I've even had to work her into my organized chaos.

Every time she finds something she thinks I'd like she puts it on my bed, so without even thinking I started leaving space so I could tell if I randomly have a new dress or seven.

Half the time I don't even wear them until three-years-later-when-I-find-them-in-the-back-of-my-closet. I'm always surprised they still fit...

Anyway, that's my sick mind's delusional 4 am thoughts on organized chaos, please send someone to make me better....