Whispers

Welcome To Our World

Thalia
Everything just sucks. I've been finding myself contemplating death a lot lately even sometimes attempting it, just to get away from it all, and by it all I mean life itself. I don't even want to get in to all the things I've done right now, because most of it is ongoing. I'm sick and tired of bitches thinking they know me. Or thinking I can't change overnight. Friends are just the worst, it's so hard having them but it's even harder being one. 

I find it funny how people you hated the most can become one of your closest friends, for example my friend Mae, at the start of the year I loved Mae, I thought she was so funny and so nice, then I got to "know" her, I realised this girl is probably the bitchiest girl I've ever met, we used to fight like cats and dogs every single week, we literally couldn't go a week without fighting, I hated her so much. Although oddly I always found myself running back to her, it's like my mind would want me to hate her but my heart just couldn't get enough of her, I'd want to make up with her like that, I hated myself for that I'd always be like "Why can't I just leave this bitch?". It's actually funny thinking about it, because I would have always been, but now more than ever, be lost without her.
Mae

I've come a long way from the first day of school. It seems like I've changed so much. I always hated being the underdog in every situation, my opinion would be passed over as if worthless. So I had to put myself out there, make myself known among other girls. I was told by my older sister "Girls are backstabbing bitches, never trust any of them",and that is horrifically true, therefore I find it hard to confide in people; At all.

Yet when I met Thalia, she was so loving and caring. She had a similar personality as me. But it all changed when our similar personalities started to clash & all hell broke loose. We would fight at least once a week and it became a routine. We both wanted the upper hand and this year I was determined to fuck over friendships to be at the top, so I was a fake bitch.

Thalia

My problem with Mae was she always wanted centre stage, as did I. I came from a background where I was always front and centre and to go from that to number 3 was a big set back for me. Although no matter what, I loved Mae. I could always tell maybe somewhere in her eyes or just a gut feeling, that there was something different about her I could sense honestly and loyalty and could tell she was trustworthy, and I was right.

Let's talk about my other friend, Valeria.

I met Valeria a while back before secondary school at a youth party, we bonded over this one guy that we did not like, as soon as she told me she was going to the same secondary school as me I was instantly ecstatic, I knew that we would be close, and I had my first set friend, seeing as I was coming into secondary school with nobody; that was my actual friend. Valeria and I started to talk more and more then our friendship grew, Snapchat and Instagram names were exchanged, and conversations started, then the big deal...FaceTime! Valeria and I FaceTimed regularly and we became really close. I really liked Valeria, she was cool, she was "popular", so she made me feel that way too. She wore make up, high heels and crop tops, she was everything I wasn't (I've always been a year younger than everybody, so I've always kinda had to adapt to their ways). Valeria made me "grow up", she didn't make me as in make me, but she made me feel like I should, Valeria talked to boys and talked about boys she made me start to do that as well, well not really talk to them but about them...

I've changed.

Mae

I've always been one for confrontations, and I instigated trouble often. I have a reputation to keep and I'm not going to lose it for anything, or anyone. The world is a sick place, & I'm just a part of it.

I trust one person and that is Thalia. My friends that I've known for 10 years aren't trustworthy enough & change their personalities in a split second. I will never understand people who have split personalities between other people & I. Besides my hypocritical self, people are fake; faker than me ; faker than plastic.

They disgust me & I'll never be able to trust any of them. Family nor friends because anyone can become an enemy like that.

I've been forced to grow thick skin & tough bones, not by my mother, but by my instinct. I honestly do not need anybody besides me, myself & Thalia; Three trustworthy people