Days in a Life

All-Natural and Delicious Dog Food

"So let's think of a name, to start." Janet was sprawled on the carpet with a pencil in her hair and a pencil in her teeth.
"Ok, how about ANADDF." I said absentmindedly.

"Really. Anaddf. How would you even say that?" Janet and I were both worn out from hours of work and thinking of names for a dog food company.

"Yeah! It stands for All Natural and Delicious Dog Food." 

"That sucks, Jules." 

"Well, can you think of anything better?"

"Easily, that's how much your name sucked." 

"Whatever." I buried my head in a pillow and let out a long groan. "what are we going to do?"

"Jules, you are too easily discouraged." Janet said, standing up. " I'm going to get some ice cream. Do you want anything?"

"The usual, please Janet."

"Double fudge peanut butter swirl with a scoop of chocolate chip vanilla, a gooey slice of chocolate chip cookie dough slightly baked on top with whipped cream, butterscotch, and chocolate chips on top?"

"That's the one."

"I'll be right back." Janet strolled out of the door, and I was alone in her fancy apartment. I looked around. I had never noticed how spacious this place was before, and now it was glaringly obvious to me how rich Janet was. Wow, she didn't even really need to make any more money, did she? I smiled a the fact that she was helping me anyway.  With significant effort, I pulled myself off of the couch and walked out onto the balcony, looking out at the New York City skyline. It really was very cool, and I couldn't imagine how famous the people who built these buildings must have been. Or the buildings themselves. As I was enjoying the view, I suddenly heard a sound behind  me. I looked over. 

There, on the roof above me, stood a woman. Her face was covered with what looked to me like a colorful women's handkerchief, and she was wearing a very stylish dress that looked like something I would wear to a fancy event. She was wearing designer Gucci sunglasses and flashy yellow high heels with straps crawling up her shins like vines. And it was then that i noticed that her shins were covered in a coarse dark hair, nothing like a girl would get even if she never shaved. Holy crap, it's a guy, I thought suddenly. And in his hand, I saw something flash. He had a knife. What?! I squinted against the sun. And then I realized. It wasn't a knife. It was something far worse.  A gu--nope! Not a gun. A voice recorder. 

"Hey! You up there with the designer heels!" I called up to him.

"Umm, hey, there." The guy said. He actually sounded about my age...and then I made the connection.

"Wolf Boy? From the park? How the hell did you figure out where I live? And, follow up question, what are you doing on my roof ? And why are you wearing a dress?? And follow up question, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU AT MY HOUSE ON MY ROOF WEARING  A FREAKING DRESS?" Confession, readers. I didn't really say "freaking". I may have said something a little different. But, that is beside the point. I was mad. Let's continue. 

"Um, no," He coughed and began speaking in a much higher pitched voice, and it sounded a little southern? I'm not really sure, honestly. "My name is Annabelle and I'm from New Jersey. I was flyin along in my hot air balloon, when suddenly, the bottom came out and I fell onto your roof! Can you help me please?"

"Um, first of all, you sound like a clown going through puberty. Second, that story was horrible--why would the bottom just fall out and why do you have a tape recorder?"

"I take offense to that," said Wolf Boy, still speaking in his ridiculously high pitched voice, "I proudly come from a long line of professional clowns and puberty was a struggle for all of them. Also, the bottom fell out because the balloon was just very flimsy, and I had a tape recorder so that I could record the sound of the wind in the sky."

"Oh, do I ever want to hear that! Play it back!" I smirked.

"Um, ok, on second." Annabelle, aka Wolf Boy, started fumbling with the buttons. Then, he took a dive right off the edge of our 30 story building.