Twilight: Betrayal

Chapter 13

63 years ago, I made one of the biggest mistakes of my existence. It was during Bella's eighteenth birthday party that I realized how much danger I was putting her in just by standing beside her. After the initial attack, my mind was racing. I was trying to convince myself that it had been a one time situation and I would never let it happen again. But I knew this way of thinking was irrational.

A million different solutions shot through my mind, but the only logical way to fix any of this was to leave. I had stood pacing in my room for hours, thinking of alternatives, but every time one came close to consideration, I remembered the blood. It amazed me how much blood had spilled from her finger considering it could only have been a slight paper cut.

My Bella was a fragile creature. What could I do? Roll her up in bubble wrap and stamp 'Handle With Care' on her forehead? Astonishingly, that had been one of the real considerations. It was nonsensical. It was pointless. As long as I was around, she would always be in danger of our kind.

After pacing all night, I thought for sure that I would go mad. I felt defeated. I walked her into the woods the next day. It was the hardest thing I have ever done. I had to lie to her. I had to break her heart. I needed her to move on as quickly and painlessly as possibly.

After I was sure that Bella would want nothing to do with any part of me, our family moved to one of our most secluded houses in Alaska. I felt empty. I stayed in my room for weeks at a time, only feeding when it was absolutely necessary. Alice would come into my darkened bedroom and whisper soothing words to me, trying to lift my spirits. I would smile and nod to her because it was the only thing I could manage to do.

They say that you cant live without taking risks, but I could never risk Bella. I could never risk something so precious as Bella's life. After seven months of consistent mourning, even Rosalie, who had been supportive of my decision wholeheartedly, began to question her own judgement. Everything snapped into focus as I heard her thoughts, clear as day.

We shouldn't have left, Edward. Do you hear me? This was a mistake, we need to go back. Look at everyone. Look at you... This isn't living, this is merely existing. Her mind was made then, and she spoke to the entire family who were placed randomly throughout the massive house. "We need to get Bella back."

Rosalie was annoyed with the shocked gasps that escaped everyone but myself. I'm sure if I hadn't read her mind and didn't know to expect this, I would be shocked too. Rosalie had never adored Bella.

"I'm sick and tired of all the grief and gloom that's been following us. I want our lives back." Before she could complete her announcement, everyone, including me, was huddled in the living room. Esme gave me a heavyhearted smile and captured my hand. She squeezed it gently but didn't let go for the duration of our discussion.

"I can't say I'm a fan of this either. I've been living in a depression cocktail for the last half year and I'm not sure I can take much more of it." Jasper looked to be relieved that someone had spoken up, despite the opening shock that it had been Rosalie to break the silence.

Everyone looked sheepishly at Jasper, knowing that we had all contributed to his suffering. Jasper's gift, that he couldn't help but think of as a curse at that moment, was to feel what others around him are feeling. He was surrounded by six grieving vampires and himself. When he grieved, he grieved seven-fold.

"But what about Bella? We left to protect her, if we go back then we destroy all the hard work it took to get to where we are now." Alice defended my previous decision with valor and my posture slumped. She was right.

"No." Rosalie said in debate. "We need Bella. She's a part of this family. I hate to openly admit it, but I was wrong." No one could believe the words that were coming from her mouth. "We aren't the same as we were, and we probably never will be if we continue on with this."

"She's finally out of danger. We destroyed Victoria and now there's no threat to her. Why should we jeopardize her safety this way?" After we'd left Bella behind, I was hell bent on finding Victoria before she decided to avenge her mate. Alice was the one to officially bring Victoria to an end and dispose of the body.

Alice stood with crossed arms and taunt features. I was baffled by the intensity of her disapproval but when I tried to listen in on her thoughts all I could hear were her spoken words being repeated over and over again.

Rosalie gave her a disbelieving look. Everyone's course of thoughts were similar to my own. Why would she be defending this point?

Rose sighed heavily and shut her eyes. "Look, there's only one Bella on this planet." She held up her index finger to emphasize her point. "One. And she's out there right now, waiting for us. We need to make our move before we lose her forever. If we lose Bella, we're always going to be stuck in this rut."

Carlisle held up a hand to stop Alice's protest. She shut her mouth tightly, grinding her teeth in the process. Carlisle was deep in thought over this turn of events. He looked into my thirsty dark eyes in hesitation. Son, I know that you were the one to originally make this decision, and you should be the one to call this shot, but I agree with Rosalie. We cannot continue on in the way we have been. I'm sorry if you don't agree, but... "Everyone pack your things, we're heading back to Forks at the break of dawn."