Chapter 18

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The bowling alley is at the far end of the plaza.  The strobe effects from the front almost blind us as we enter, however Jamie seems to be able to stand the brightness and knows the way through the everlasting cavern of pictures of the area towards the entrance to the actual alley.  It is surprisingly modern, and the walkway is alight with glittering fairy lights.  The automatic doors at the end of the corridor open wide to reveal a surprisingly cosy bowling alley, with 15 large lanes and a cafe next to it.  The staff look warm and friendly  and for the first time since I've left the blueness of the coffee shop, it seems like everything is going smoothly.  Jamie walks confidently towards the counter where we can purchase bowling shoes and, to my surprise and amazement at Jamie's excellent choice, order drinks to be brought to us when  we bowl.  The shoes are stupid, but we have to wear them.                                     "Anything else for you?" the young man with the name-tag "Larry " says, chewing gum as he speaks.   "One question," Harriet says slightly suspiciously, "Are you the owner of this whole plaza?"                        "No, heavens no," Larry says, still chewing, "It's my brother's, Gary.  I told him that I wanted to have something of my own in this building, he named it after me.  Anyway, what deal do you want?"                  "The unlimited lane bring two get one free deal that you do." Jamie recites, pleased he stops talking about his life and relationship with "Gary" and gets back onto what they actually want.                                "Doest mine ears deceive me?" asks Larry, mocking Jamie, "If you read the small print Mr Wise Guy, you'd realize that you can't do multibuy offers.  But..." he continues, before Jamie can get a word in edgeways, "As I'm feeling generous, I'll do it anyway."                                                                                                     Jamie smiles at Larry, his face changing from one mood to another in almost (but not quite) a second.  "No problem," Larry says with a cheeky grin, "Just don't tell anyone I did this.  They will not be impressed."

We thank Larry and walk over to the lane, which now has Jamie's booking name on the screen flashing in bold, bright, red letters.  When we reach the screen, Jamie presses the start key of the keypad next to it and starts to fill in our names.  When he reaches the column entitled nickname, he pauses a moment.  He looks from Harriet to I and I can tell he is trying to think of something to call us.  "How about...?" Jamie thinks aloud, "Neptune's Beard for you Harriet? I do love a good Greek myth."    Harriet smiles at him.  Jamie is in his element as he types quickly.  This is obviously one of his and Harriet's more regular activities together.  They show each-other such compassion, I wish I thought like that about people.  But, in a strange way, I feel like I am learning humility, affection, all these words that I thought never could be applied to me.  And I don't need to rely on a cheating idiot to tell me that I'm perfect, that I'm literally his life.  I need friends who tell me when I'm making a stupid mistake, doing something silly or not thinking straight. That is what makes a true friend.                              "And," Jamie continues, after typing Harriet's nickname quickly, "I'll be called "the Vanquisher."             I snort as I imagine a picture of Jamie with a sword and a shield, weighed down by chainmail.                   "And you can be the "angel in the dark." Jamie finishes with a final flourish as he enters it in.              After the nicknames, we have to choose the balls.  It's hard, there are so many, with so many different holes.  Eventually, Jamie decides on a red, swirly ball, Harriet on a blue and white ball.  However, I choose my favourite coloured ball, yellow and orange.  It is my only hope of wolloping their arses.

After two hours of bowling, it comes down to a tiebreak between Jamie and I.  Harriet had a disastrous 9th game,and she was completely out of the running.  This is real friendship.  Not smoking in the middle of an orchard without a care for anything or running around sweaty on a squash court.               "We have come to a tie-break," announces Harriet, "'The angel in the dark' has one shot to beat the defending champion of this contest, 'the Vanquisher'.   It's time to find if she will succeed.  But for now, please welcome the title holder, the conqueror, the destroyer of all rivals 'The Vanquisher'."                        Jamie prepares himself for the bowl, his nostrils flaring a little as he moves his arm forwards and backwards.  Still breathing deeply, he throws the ball in a tremendous flourish down the runway.           "And..." Harriet watches, waiting, "9!  Oh what a shame for the Vanquisher on his final ball.  However, the only way that the 'angel in the dark' is going to beat him is by getting a strike.  COME ON!"                   I look towards the end of the runway, trying to feel the ball between my fingers.  For a moment, I imagine I'm throwing a discus or hammer, however that is the wrong technique.  I feel my whole body go tense as I grip the ball and, very slowly but surely, I push my arm backwards and then forwards and throw.  I turn away, not wanting to watch.  I hear Harriet praying and Jamie swearing under his breath. "Yes!" Harriet shrieks as she looks up, "Lauren is the winner.  Congratulations!  This is a historical event for all of us here.  I'd like to welcome Lauren to make her acceptance speech before we leave."     "Yes, yes," I agree, "I am deeply honored to accept this victory and would like to thank everyone who has made this possible,  especially my two best friends in all the world Jamie and Harriet.  Thanks."       And we all embrace, sharing in our own madness.  

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