Lost

Chapter 9 - Sleep Talking

Ant wakes up at some point during the night, and he wants to see what the time is but to be quite frank, he cannot be bothered to fetch the torch because Dec is nestled against him in a way that is so comfortable. Ant finds it hard to fall back asleep because his mind is overthinking about everything: Lisa, Dec, his mam, work and friends. He is usually an optimistic person, but he is starting to lose confidence in the fact that they will get rescued and get back to normal, and even though he doesn't want to make Dec think it, Ant already thinks Dec feels the same.

As Ant lies there, Dec is snug against his chest and seems to be enjoying a deep sleep. A few more minutes pass as Ant continues thinking, but his thought train is interrupted when he hears Dec say something. "Hey pet, what did you say?" Ant quietly asks, but after there is no answer Ant just assumed that Dec was sleep talking, and thinks no more of it. That is, until it happens again, and this time Ant does catch it. "Oh god...so good" he says, and it's kind of mumbly and as he says it he partially grabs at Ants shirt a bit more. Ant isn't quite so sure what Dec is dreaming about, but he is kind of intrigued. "Yes" Dec breathes out shortly after, and it does sound a bit...moany.

Ant finally clicks that Dec must be having some kind of sexual dream, and he feels ashamed when he wants to hear more. However, something in his mind tells him he just wants to re-enact what's going on in Decs dream on him right now and give him what it is that he wants, but he knows that it's so wrong. They're just friends...right? Ant tries to push any ideas right back into the 'no-go zone' at the back of his mind, and as Dec settles back down into silence, a very flustered and slightly...aroused Ant finally falls asleep. 

The next morning, almost 3 days after the crash, Ant is acting very distant, and Dec thinks that it is due to the events from yesterday. He never meant to upset Ant, and he doesn't want it to change their friendship but he can't help but think that the damage is done. Something tells Dec that the only reason that Ant is still around him is that he has no-one else around. On the other hand, Ant knows that something is troubling Dec and he isn't sure what it is. Ant isn't sure if Dec was really dreaming about him, because he has Ali, but then why would he clutch onto Ants shirt? 'Mind you, Dec could've subconsciously thought that I was Ali' Ant concludes, and he just continues sitting there in silence, picking at a croissant that may be going stale. 'I really don't understand why I dreamt about Anth like that...I mean, maybe what happened on the beach influenced it, but I'm a straight man' Dec ponders to himself, and Ant hears his thoughts. After getting over the shock he decides to confront Dec about it.

"Something on your mind Decky?" Ant questions, and Dec looks at Ant almost instantly afterwards. "No, just tired" Dec lies, but Ant has a witty reply in store. "Are you sure you're tired Decs? You seemed to be enjoying a rather deep, dream-riddled sleep last night" Ant tries to innocently say, but he notices Dec blush almost instantly after the reply leaves his lips. "Er yeah about that Anth...I....I er...look I'm sorry Anth, what did you...hear?" is all that Dec can manage before he feels his lip quivering. "Look Dec you don't need to explain to me I heard enough and I'm not going to ridicule you about it either. What I don't want is for this to make things more tense between us, because to be quite honest, should we spend our time arguing or being distant?" Ant asks, and Dec feels like he wants to scream, cry, run away and hug Ant all at the same time. "Thank you Anth, but I'll tell you. I don't understand why it happened, it kind of scares me to be honest, maybe it was a one-time thing, and I didn't mean anything by it I swear" Dec explains, and Ant can sense the panic in Decs tone. "Come ere" Ant orders, and the pair sit and hug and comfort each other in silence for a while. 

"I was thinking that we should maybe try and make a fire Dec, I mean, it's not exactly cold but a fire would be nice" Ant decides, and Dec agrees that it would be a good idea, but he describes his disappointment that there aren't any marshmallows available. "Never mind I'll just pop to Tesco...oh wait" Ant jokes, and Dec bursts out into a full belly laugh. "I'll go find some fire wood stuff, there seems to be plenty around" Dec says, and Dec sets off to find some a short while later. Whilst Dec is gone, Ant decides to fetch the bags that were flung from the plane during the crash, and as he clambers out of the plane he sees the blanket on the floor, but there isn't a body underneath it anymore. Ant realises that at some point, an animal had dragged the body away, and he shudders at the thought. Although he wants to feel guilty, he knows that he did what was best for himself and Dec's safety. For the next half an hour he sits there, sifting through the bags and sorting out where to put stuff.