A New Type of Realism

(24) Death Toll

I looked out the rear window at the compound we'd left behind.

"Maggie..."

.....................

I would've mourned Maggie, if I'd had the time. Martin would've cried. Slade would've made some comment about not caring while failing to conceal the obvious emotion inside of him. We would have talked for hours about her and her unique comforting ways. We would have remembered what she'd done for our group, and the way that she'd been our rock, despite her meek and mild personality.

If we'd had the time, we would have done so much...

...But Cloud had apparently slashed our tires, and the car was running on fumes, perhaps the monster had also sliced through the oil tank, although that seemed a little too far, even for him. The car had bumbled to a stop, barely twenty metres from the compound. We sat like bunnies in shark infested water, just waiting for the infected to pounce on our metal container.

Martin was terrified, I could see it in his face, in the way he trembled so slightly. He was trying to be brave, but the loss of Maggie and our impending doom seemed to be too much for him. I pulled him into me and enveloped him into what I hoped was a hug that would create a separate world for him; a world where monsters and the infected did not exist, where everything was as soft as a cloud. Not a cloud. Goddamn.

I ruffled his hair before letting go, proud to see that he had not started crying. Now was not the time for tears, now was the time for bright ideas and escape plans. I looked at Slade, though I knew instantly that he was just as lost as I was. I took a deep breath, knowing that the longer we waited, the lower our chances of survival were. I put my hand on the handle of the car door, and braced myself for what would be a long distance race. I grabbed hold of Martins hand, and exited into the world outside the safety of the car. Pulling Slade out of the driver's side as gently as hammer shaping metal, I started to run.

I'd never run so hard or fast in my entire life, and I knew I'd put some distance between myself and the hoard of infected, that by the looks of it, were only beginning to realise that we weren't in the base. There was honestly no way I could think of that would guarantee that we would make it out alive of this situation, but running away was our only hope.

Soon, my lungs began to burn as the bag on my back carved rivets into my shoulders. If I took the bag off, we'd have no previsions for our future, as I'm sure that Martin and Slade would relieve themselves of their heavy burdens too. My legs turned to jelly and started in wonder at them, amazed that they were still moving at such an incredible pace. I looked at the others and noticed that they were suffering just as much as I was, and without a view of any building on the horizon in front of us, I knew that we would not make it to wherever we were going without dropping the bags behind us.

I began to take off my backpack, and told the others to do the same. Slade raised the issue of provisions, but having looked behind us at the rapidly gaining hoard, he chose to follow my example. We continued running, but we were no athletes. We were spent. We could go no further.

There were no trees or hills around to hide from, this barren and bare landscape was all we had. Why in the world had we chosen to move onto unknown territory?! We had known that there were at least two buildings behind us that we could barricade ourselves inside, but now, because of my stupidity, Martin would not reach his Mother. Martin was going to die. I was going to break my promise.

Tears formed in my eyes, blurring my vision as they began to sting. It was the equivalent of having accidentally rubbed shampoo into them after a long and hot shower. Oh, what I'd give for a shower.

"Dile! We can't go any further!" Slade panted. His words were so spaced out from his erratic breathing, that I could barely make out what he had said. I looked at him and shook my head.

"We've got to keep going, it's our only chance!"

"But what if you're right?" I slowed slightly, involuntarily. I was pushed so far beyond my limits that I was sure I break out into a realm that no one had discovered before too long.

"I'm not, it's a stupid delusion!"

"We are going to die either way, Dile."

Martin looked between us in confusion, and wiped away the sweat dripping from his short, ginger hair, into his puffy eyes.

I stopped running, and waited for them to realise. "If you really think it's worth it?" Slade nodded. "No, no, not like this. If I'm wrong..." Slade reiterated firmly that it was our only chance. "No, I'll test out my ridiculous theory, you take Martin and keep running." He tried to fight against me, but I'd made up my mind. "GO!" I shouted, as I began to slowly walk towards the oncoming hoard of infected.

"I still hate you, Dile." I heard Slade's voice from behind me. I did not turn around to look at him but merely told him to get running. I couldn't believe I was going to die for HIM.

It wasn't for him though. I wasn't doing this for Slade. I was doing this for Martin. I was doing this for Maggie. For Cooper. Kyle. Ben. I was doing it for all of them. I was atoning for every time I'd let them down. For every time I'd cowered in the corner like the coward I was. For all the times I'd wished Dylan had been here to save me and to lead us all out of the country, instead of me. For all the times I'd acted out in anger or fear. For the blood on my hands. This was for all of them. This was for the boy I was once, and for the man I had become.

I stretched out my hands and angled my head to the sky. I closed my eyes, and for the first time in a long time; I relaxed.

I heard the beating footsteps of the infected getting louder. I heard their groans cut deeper into the silence and peace within me with every step they took. I sniffed at the first waft of that acrid smell and I knew they were nearly upon me. This was it. Time to die. I opened my eyes to welcome my death with open arms...

...moments later, it was my scream that rang through the air.

......................