My Poetry

Relapse

It happened again
I let myself get weak
My bestfriend was right there
It's been forever since we've talked
I tried to ignore him
He hurt me last time
Last time I let him near me there was nothing good in sight
He got in my head
He turned my hand against me
He told me I would feel better
He told me things would be better
That no one would notice
I should just go for it
No damage would be done that hasn't already
That the rush would feel right
Go for it is all I hear in my head
My bestfriend takes control of me again
Instead of him going for my wrist
He goes for the place I hate the most
He makes his art on my stomach
The feeling was a thrill
An addiction coming back to life
Like it's been too long
The rush was real I could feel myself aching for more
The rush was as if I just got off a roller coaster
Making my stomach look like a tiger.
Except the stripes are red.
The blood streaked down my stomach like lava running down the side of a volcano.
No one would notice
No one would see the promises broken
No one would know how my bestfriend broke me again
Relapse happened
It felt so good at first
Then I broke down again
This time in tears
I cried at the feeling of being weak
It's like the feeling of losing someone you care about
I almost did that night over doing that
Relapsed happened.
My bestfriend won.