A Hole in the Heart

Chapter 3

I wake up to a bright, sunny day, well rested. The day can't get any bet-. As reality hits me it's like the clouds come out to cover the sun. Dad is still in the hospital. They do not know why he had the stroke. We do not know when he will be home.

I flop back on my bed and cover my face with my pillow. Soon I hear Mom come up the stairs. "Amanda? You should have been up twenty minutes ago." I do not respond, so she takes the pillow from my face. "You need to get up so you can catch the bus." With that she turns and walks out of the room. I know there is no arguing; the tone in her voice said that much.

Grumbling I get up and dress for school. I could not care less how I look so it comes to jeans and an old T-shirt that is too big. My hair is thrown back into a bun that looks like a four year old put it up. When I get downstairs breakfast is ready and waiting, but I just grab a piece of toast, and walk out the door.

From the porch I can see Bryan waiting for the bus. I am not in the mood to talk so I wait near a bush where he cannot see me. When the bus pulls up I let him get on first, then find a seat by myself. The time passes in a blur of houses and trees. I an the last one off of the bus when we reach school.

I stop by my locker to throw my bag in it. Slamming it shut I continue on to homeroom. I walk in just as my name is being called, and say "here". I sit in a seat closest to the door even though I can feel Sarah's eyes on me. After the announcements of "high schoolers stay away from the middle school hall", "make this year great! Join the basketball team!", and every other cheesy or stupid thing they could say, the bell rings and I bolt for my first class.

The entire day passes like this and I spend lunch in the library. I know that Mom will not be home when I get there so I decide to walk the three miles after school. When I reach home I find a note on the doorstep from Bryan  asking what was up and to call or come over. I suppose Sarah must have told him that I was in school, and he would have figured out that I was avoiding everyone.

I send him an email saying that I was busy and had projects to work on; that was why I was not at lunch. Once it sends, I turn off the computer and the wifi from my phone. This way I will not get a response, or at least not see it, for awhile.

I am standing at the stove stirring macaroni when Mom gets home. I even manage to get a believable smile when she asks me how school was. There us no mention of Dad throughout the entire night and while I am curious, I am grateful.

After cleaning up from supper, I grab an early shower and head straight to my room. For a little while I lay in bed thinking but that does nothing to ease my mind. I get up and pick a book to read for the millionth time. I try to read but I am only have paying attention to the book.

Somewhere along the way I fall asleep while reading, because when I wake, my book is open on the floor.