Heartbeat

The Phone Call

I stare at my phone. My heart is pounding and my hands start sweating.

I can feel my mouth wide open with shock.

My muscles are stiff and I can't move them, but I force myself to put my hand out and take hold of my phone.

I press talk.

My voice shaky, I speak.

"Hello?"

I hear mumbling, and can't even tell if it's Ethan.

My heart is still beating like an elephants body.

I try again, this time louder and clearer.

"Hello?"

No answer.

I hear cracking, then beeping. The call ends.

Reluctantly, I try calling back.

"Hey," I hear, pressing my ear to the phone.

I swallow, hoping he can't hear it. It has been maybe a year or two since I've talked to Ethan.

I try to think up something casual to say.

"Hi. Why are you calling?"

I would be shocked if he actually came up with something to please me.

He clears his throat.

"I've been wanting to tell you this for a-"

I hear the same beeping noise again, and the call ends.

Whispering, I curse.

I could have said all my love for him right then and there.

I could have asked him if he wanted to go somewhere with me.

I could have asked him why the call ended the last time.

But at this point, I don't care.

All I want is to know what he was about to say.

I've been wanting to tell you what? That you love me? That you've noticed I like you? That you have also liked me for seven years?

I stop my thinking and put down my phone.

Don't call back. He will know I'm trying.

I'll talk to him tomorrow, looking the greatest I ever have.

I will ask him what he was going to tell me, with a confident voice.

For once, I will approach him.