THE EMERCITY

01

AURORA

My hands clenched around my hooded sweater. The black cotton was drenching under the minuscule pellets of rain, gathering against my knuckles as they quenched beneath the fabric.

Brown tendrils peaked from my jacket, causing them to soak within the other strands of hair. Beads of water skipped down my shirt, evidentially making me shiver from the spiked, bitter winds. Weather in February was never a thrilling nor pleasing outcome here. It stormed more often than snowed, and at times, the sun believed to be non existent even during the seasons of summer.

Avoiding the darting drops, I raised my head; slightly. A spray of light shimmered from the house stood before me. Pools of rain washed upon the window in a thin, sharp layer, causing a computer screen to dance colours of ember against the reflection. Sat in front of the screen was my mother. Her hair fell in a gorgeous hazel, curled at the ends due to the long hours of the day, clearing away the straightened strands. Her fingers tapped at the keyboard resting before her very eyes, typing her contrite days on a blank worksheet, a smile printing her face as she reminisced her stupidity of young love and misfortune with my father.

Writing was her catharsis after he passed away. The words on a page seemed to be the only way to keep his memory alive, and it soothed her. Her heart ached for his touch and fluctuating heart, which only caused mine to break at its furthest.

They were in love. A deep, compassionate, doting, allegiant kind of love. The type that only seemed to exist in the fanatics of fairytales and dreamt fantasies. It taught me to pursue the hope he always carried that I too, would one day find the love that they both admirably shared. Although, within the few moments his last breath conquered and his heart pumped the last flow of blood his veins could produce. I quickly realised that fairytales and dreams were only known towards their 'happy endings', but notice that if there is no happy ending, there never was a fairytale to begin with? How when you dream, at some point you have to awaken, no matter how tender his hands rested against your own?

That's how it felt to loose him; and for her, I could only imagine.

Rain washed the tears staining my cheeks. Droplets clung onto my lashes and increased the wetness that surrounded my eyelids almost instantly. A shaky breath escaped my chapping lips, which followed with a blanc puff of smoke blinding the clear view of my mother with every exhilarating breath I took. The bleak winds caused my mind to set aside the pain that currently pulsated within me, and focused on setting my feet to trek back home.

Thunder hammered above me, and the vibrations it sent down my spine allowed a quick, bizarre shift in atmosphere as I saw my mothers smile flicker into something uncanny. The gesture caused gilt to suppress me as I went through tomorrow's occurrences over and over; reminding myself that after tomorrow, she'd be alone.

February 12th held the destined route that I would call my future. My new home, the people I communicate with on a day to day basis; from this point onwards, there were rules. Rules that I had to oblige by.

To say that I was ready would be untrue, I wasn't prepared to leave the remaining facets of my father in our neighbourhood, nor was I prepared to leave the woman that made sure my upbringing was as good as it possibly could've been. Pain struck me every time I imagined her cheeks staining from the unstoppable number of tears she drowned within when we lost him, and to even think of that occurring even the slightest again from me leaving home, broke my heart.

My toes swamped within the circulation of rain drops gathered in the black laced trainers I chose within the commencing of my walk. Averting my attention back into reality, the soaking of my clothes was enough to head into the front door. I found that walks were therapeutic when my heart held heavy emotions. I'd always rather conceal how I felt and release them where not a single soul could witness my heart shatter.