Hetalia × Reader Oneshots

Ex-Lover Disguise! (Murica)

HEY GUYS! I'm in Cali(fornia) for vacation! And....nobody cares😔
Let's get on with the story, shall we? And again...no one's here😧 Why do I even bother? Also, I'll be using another OC. Kinda.
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~•~3rd Person P.O.V.~•~

(C/N) was a country a few hundred nautical miles away from America. It's a small island, and was only recently found. It apparently lived off of stealing from other countries and cut itself off from the world to avoid any meddlesome country get up in their business. Crapass logic, really, those hypocrites.

It's personification, a (Y/A)-year-old girl named (Y/N), has a cold, frank attitude and an expressionless face to match. She's surprisingly strong, too. She almost never attended a meeting, and when she did, she'd call most of them idiots and leave. Especially America. She has shown a disliking to the American. He was annoying af to probably the whole world, excluding the other members of the 'Awesome' trio. Although, she did have an interest in him...

Alfred loved playing pranks on her. At least, attempting to. So he decided to look through her diary (journal as she called it, but didn't realize that a journal is public) to find some prank material he could use.

And he found one.

There was a mortal guy she likes. Onyx eyes, straight sandy-blonde hair, at least 5'9.3 in height, and was eighteen years old, has a goofy attitude. His name was Kaiden. That was all that was written. She likes a guy with a goofy attitude. Then how come she hates me?!

He quickly got that out of his head as he planned the prank.

Little did he know the huge fault in that plan.

~•~ THAAA NEXT DAY!~•~

That day, there was no meeting held. Not like she would attend anyway. He was wearing black contacts he got from Japan and a gray hoodie.
He also straightened his hair, leaving out Nantucket.

He visited (C/N)'s capitol, Rettan. He was told by one of her more sociable siblings that she likes to walk around the outskirts of Rettan in the early afternoon until dusk. It took an hour to find her, but then he realized that it was still before afternoon.
But even when afternoon came, he had trouble finding (C/N). He stopped by a gaming shop. When he was about to open the door, he spotted the young personification of (C/N) across the street. At a flower shop.

She noticed him to, for she almost dropped her flowers. He walked over to her.
"K-Kaiden, (Hello) (Everything in the parenthesis is in your language). (It's nice to s-see you around.)"

Alfred had no idea what the hell she just said. But it probably went along the lines of 'Hello'. She hugged him. Really. REALLY. Tightly. Her face was buried in his chest. He also caught a whiff of her scent, which was (Insert Scent Here). His heart was cartwheeling. She let go and looked up at him.
"You've gotten taller." He nodded. "You broke a promise." ''WHAT?!" He looked at her with a WTH face. She pouted a bit.

"You said you wouldn't grow any taller. You were already tall enough."

~•~(Y/N)'s P.O.V.~•~

Alfred is such an idiot. Kaiden is dead. He died a month ago. I might as well play along until I jack his ass up next time.

I smile sweetly. "(You are a fucking idiot, you know that?)" He looked at me with a confused face. I smirked a bit.
"I said, how was it in Canada?" Of course, I was messing with him. Kaid never went abroad in his life. He chuckled nervously. "It was okay, dud- I mean eh." I mentally guffaw at his horrible attempt at a Canadian accent. I mean really? Do Canadians really say 'eh' a lot?

"(Seriously, you could have at least tried a better accent.)" More confused stares. "Have you really been there long enough to forget your home tongue? I asked if you wanted to play around like we used to." He grinned to cocky a grin for my ex-lover, and nodded.

~•~Timeskeep~•~

Alfred and I were laughing and joking around the entire afternoon (and he barely noticed me call him by his real name). We were sitting on a bench, then I saw a lady that looked around her late twenties. I bend down as if I was tying my shoe, but I was really untying Alfred's.

"Kai, your shoes are untied. I dare you to go up to that lady and tie your shoes in front of her. Then, ask her if you can ask her a question. When she says yes, get up and jump around yelling 'She said yes!' Over and over. Act like you won the lottery." He nodded, and did as I said.

Just as hoped for, the lady said yes. Alfred started jumping around happily, yelling what I told him to. From here, it looked like a proposal. Then the woman's boyfriend came.

Laughing, I run over to him and grab his hand, and didn't stop running, just for the fun of it. Panting, I turn to him and laugh.

"That was hilarious! I have an idea! Let's switch clothes, and I try to pick up girls!" I say with a fire in my eyes. "W-What?!" "Yes! I saw it in a Vocaloid music video!"

And, being the idiots we were, we actually did it.
And got into a lot of trouble doing so.

~•~Anader Timeskeep~•~

It was almost sunset, and Alfred's act was fading. We had fun, but it was time I tell him.

"Kai, I want to show you something." "Yeah! Let's go dude!" I smile faintly.

I called a taxi to the grave yard. "Dude, where are we going?" We got out, and I paid (he has the time to waste to straighten his usual mess of a hair and get colored contacts, but not (C/N/ian/ic/an) currency). We walked to a small hill overlooking the entire grave yard. On the headstone wrote 'Kaiden Embers'.

"Alfred, you can quit the act now. I know it's you." He took off the contacts.
"Dude, how did you know it was me?"
"Because you're the only idiot who'd actually play this stupid a prank."
"Oh."

I giggled a bit.
"That's okay Afred. You know what, this is actually the first time I've laughed this much in weeks. I have to thank you for that."

I could see his cheeks tinted pink. It was adorable. Not knowing what to say next, I walked over to him, grabbed his hoodie, and kissed him really hard.

~•~Murica's P.O.V.~•~

She. Was. KISSING MEEE!!!

~•~(Y/N)'s P.O.V.~•~

I felt his arms wrap around my waist. His tongue slid across my mouth. Teasingly, I open it.

The next day, we woke up in a random hotel with no clothes on.

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That ENDING.
Also, I just had an akward experience earlier. I'm still trying to not go into full Tagalog while I'm speaking. I saw a guy who was about to trip.
And did you know that Tagalog for "You're going to trip!" Is "Madapa ka"?
Pronounce it, non-Filipinos.