Modern Mulan

Chapter 4

^^Dedication for the art at the side

WHAT?! Not an apology message but an actual chapter.......

Also I know less than nothing about army ranks or the army in general so i'm using the British army website to try and understand it all. So sorry for anything that sounds like a load of crap 'cause i really don't get it.

This chapter seems a bit boring to me. Not entirely happy with it if i'm honest... let me know what you think though

Anyhoo... Enjoy <3

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When my alarm woke me in the morning I considered rolling over and going back to sleep. The only thing that made me get up was the need to pee. While washing my hands I looked in the mirror and really saw myself. Short dark hair, dark circles around my eyes, a frown on my face. Completely different to how I looked this time yesterday morning.  I turned my face away from the mirror and jumped into the shower after turning the hot water on.

By the time I made it back to my room I was filled with determination. I will prove to James that I can do this I thought trying to tell myself I don’t need him. With my head held high I roughly dried my hair and picked up my bandages trying to wrap them exactly how I had yesterday. After the third try I managed to do it correctly. Smiling to myself I slipped on a pair of black boy shorts, a plain loose t-shirt and the baggy grey jogging bottoms I normally reserved for lazy days around the house, my bandages kept me from needing a bra. Abandoning my shoes for now to keep my noise to a minimum I opened my bedroom door slowly and listened for any sign of my parents. After no sound was heard I grabbed the letter I scrawled last night and snuck down the stairs. The shock that went through me when I saw my mother sitting on the sofa with the summons in her hand was enough for her to hear me. She turned her head and patted the seat next to her. I cautiously sat down and waited for her to speak.

“I know what you’re going to do today, Carly.” Was all she said, silence followed for an immeasurable amount of time before I asked how she knew.

“I heard you and James arguing last night. I woke up to use the bathroom and the window was open. I’m sorry for listening but what are you thinking Carly? You can’t just go waltzing in there.”

“I’m sorry mum. I can’t let dad go in there with his condition. You have to know that he doesn’t stand a chance. There’s no one else that can go for him so I have to. He doesn’t deserve it.”

“I know” Again with the short sentences. “I’m going to say you can’t go and you are going to argue against me, ok? We’re going to keep arguing ad you’ll convince me it’s for the best.”

 I gave her a confused look but the tears in her eyes told me that she already knew I was right. “Mum, we don’t need to do this. You know I’m right. Don’t feel like you’re a bad person because you feel it’s the right thing for me to go. I’d go without your say so anyway” I took one of her hands in both of mine.

“But you’re my daughter and I’m allowing you to go in there and possibly die. How am I a good mother? A good parent wouldn’t do that, Carly. Do you know what the worst thing is? I can see your reasoning, I can see it’s a good idea and…. I don’t want to fight you about it.” She tries to say something else but it is lost in her sobbing.

“Don’t ever think you’re a bad mother. You and dad, you’ve done everything that I could ask for and more. There is nothing you could do to stop my decision. I’d go whether you approved or not. I wasn’t even planning on telling you about me leaving” I passed her the letter that had been resting on the sofa beside my leg. She took her hand from mine and wiped her eyes before taking the paper and unfolded it. After a quick scan she folded it back up and put it on the small wooden table to the side of the sofa and replaced it with the summons. She held on to it for a few moments like she was deciding if this was the right thing to do. She drew in deep breath and exhaled slowly before handing me the summons with her eyes closed, as if it caused her physical pain to put it in my hand. When her eyes finally opened they had aged beyond her years. A silent agreement had passed between us in that moment; I would go in my father’s place, she wouldn’t say anything and my dad wouldn’t know about this discussion at all.