I feel his weight behind forceful hands stationed around my wrists.
I look away with my hands in fists.
Anxiety has come to visit me today.
He tells me He needs a place to stay.
I've known him too long to decline... Who knows how long he will linger inside. Invading every part of me until I can't breath again and again.
I'm shaking
Aching
The slightest move; I flinch.
I'm making myself write so that I don't lose my mind
I need something to calm my nerves but damn... I've made so many promises.
I just want to lie in bed and not move.
I want him to come over and lie with me.
Don't say a word.
Just lie there.
Just be there.
The silence is both calming and unsettling.
It means I'm alone.
And yet... It means I'm alone.
