I APOLOGIZE SINCERELY HONESTLY TRULY FOR THIS SUPER DUPER LATER UPDATE. Ik some of you actually care about this book (which is super surprising for a kid who thought she was writing solely into a void omg ily guiz so much) And and and tbh I rewrote the third chapter atleast five times and published it four times and deleted it every fuckin time becuz omg this book is so close to my heart yet so difficult to write so YES im sorry and yes ill shut up ok enjoy.
******
"D'you mind?"
You answered yourself as you took out a silver lighter, it's metal surface glinting between your fingers, a soft smile on your lips.
I swallowed, swayed by how picturesque you looked; green eyes, dark chaotic hair, a grey cable sweater. Like an estranged movie star from the fifties, back when movies were monochrome and plots were too clichéd.
Shit.
If this is had been another day (any other goddamn day)and you weren't sprawled across my sheets looking like Adonis, I would've said yes.
Yes, I did mind.
You would've probably asked why, not understanding that getting the disgusting smell of cigarettes off of my sheets was going to take aeons. Or the fact that my mother would eventually find out in that twisted way all mothers do.
You took my rhetoric silence as an answer for your rhetoric question and within seconds, I heard the familiar crackle of fire burning against paper.
"D'you know who Nietzsche is, Cara Evelyn?"
I snapped out of my reverie and looked at you. You had your glasses on and a strange expression on your face as you pulled your Converses up on my sheets. An unvoiced protest ran back down my throat.
"God is dead." I sighed, as you blew smoke into the still winter air of my bedroom almost artistically. I averted my eyes and swallowed.
"Right," your voice had a smile in it, as if a third eye had caught onto that conspicuous move.
"I forget that this generation still has some well read people." You grinned and I scoffed, making your grin widen. My angst was always something that made you laugh.
"Has anyone told you how insufferable your God's complex is sometimes?"
" 'Sometimes.' You flatter me, Follet." You laughed once again. "And for the record I don't usually let those pricks prick my ego."
"Kudos on that pun. And I think its quite impossible to stunt your ego."
You snapped your gaze to me, amusement laced in your electric eyes, my fairy lit ceiling played all sorts of illusions in those orbs of yours, making them look luminescent. I blinked again, and your eyes were back to normal.
"Why's that Cara Evelyn?" You asked, leaning forward.
"Your ego is the size of Australia, mate." I replied backhandedly, leaning backward. You hummed in agreement and took another drag, you offered me the burning cigarette but I shook my head.
"I second that thought. But no, I mean why did you use the word 'quite impossible'?"
"For your ego?" I asked and you nodded blowing smoke the other way.
"I thought I was invincible, Cara Evelyn. I wanna know what could break me." You grinned, the strange luminosity back in your eye, a dimple forming almost insusceptibly.
I resisted the urge to groan out loud. You were way too much to handle, and the worst part was you didn't even realize it. Or even if you did, you made absolutely no effort to minimize my pain.
Interaction with you was like participating in a marathon where you were coursing ahead irrespective of whatever I did. The power distribution wasn't appreciated.
A sudden surge of recklessness and frustration coursed through me and I stood up, my skater skirt hiked dangerously high. Your eyes flickered to my skirt's hem and then to me, and I felt a smirk form on my lips.
"I think," I leaned forward placing my hands on either side of the bed, leaning in close, the distance between us rapidly closing.
"Your destruction would be quite simple, Archer."
"Is that so?" You asked, the smoke surrounding us, clouds sighing at two teenagers playing at something they didn't understand.
"Yeah." I replied, staring straight into your strange eyes. Clouded by smoke, shrouded with nicotine.
"Breaking your ego would be the easiest." I rolled the words off my tongue like it was a slice of lime I had sucked on.
"My ego, darlin'?" You smiled at me, complacently taking another drag, your eyebrows knitted as you waited for me to finish.
"Your ego couldn't possible bear the brunt of having to worship someone else than yourself. So yes Theo, your destruction is quite simple." I smiled. "All someone would have to do to break you, is to get you to worship them. To get you infatuated with them."
Your eyes which weren't laced with humor now. It had an element I couldn't place my hand on, but I knew I had finally crossed the finish line.
"Love?" I smirked. "Darlin', you're so clichéd." I clucked my tongue and took the lit cigarette from in-between your fingers and squished it underneath my ballet flats, looking straight into your eyes. Oh your strange, brilliant, wonderful and awful awful eyes.
Anger. Frustration. Awe.
A full spectrum of human emotion.
"I'm going home now, Cara Evelyn." You announced, standing up. I looked at you and smiled my blinding Cara smile. It didn't faze you.
"Bye, Archer." I continued grinning as you walked out of my room, giving me a whispered goodbye I would have almost missed if the Jesse Rutherford song hadn't ended at that very moment.
I didn't miss the look on your face though. The look you gave me as you shut my bedroom door leaving me surrounded with cigarette smoke. As if you couldn't understand what I said. Or worse, you couldn't understand how someone like me had gotten around to saying it.
I wondered what the hell I gotten myself into, as I lay across my wooden floor. My fairylights turning into bokeh. And eventually into darkness.
You've gotten yourself into a hurricane.
I woke up at 3 A.M to your phone call. Jolting awake to find sweat beading on my forehead and a blanket that hadn't been there before.
Mom. I cringed at the thought of her finding me. The smell of nicotine was still lingering overhead as I pushed myself up.
Sighing, I reached over to find my phone on my bed.
"This is an ungodly hour to call-" I started saying when I saw your name across my phone screen.
"Cara Evelyn Follet, go out with me."
