I'm Happier Than Ever (Phan)

Chapter 1

(A/N the next two chapter don't make sense at all I hate this fic. It needs to be burned. -Alex)

Dan POV

I was getting ready for bed.I was like 10 pm quite early for me obviously because i usually go to bed at 3 am or something. When i heard some talking and rustling from Phil's room. I walked to the door of the room my flat mate. He was probably editing or something. I tried to open the door. But for some reason the door was locked. Phil never normally locked his door. Maybe he was looking at porn or something. I doubt that. I yelled "Phil are you jerking off or doing something productive". I heard a loud thump. "What the fuck are you doing Phil". I quietly heard the video play it said something like "happy birthday Dan" or something the rest was inaudible. Suddenly Phil opened the door and ran towards the bathroom.

Phil POV

I locked myself in the bathroom and started silently crying.

"He probably heard it all" I sobbed. The suprise is ruined... "Fuck" I searched for the one thing that keeped me sane for a while. I couldn't find it so I sat back down and leant my back against the wall.

Then after like 2 minutes of sobbing i heard Dan yell "Phil come back out you twat!"

before Dan came to the door I was editing a "Special" vid that was about us.

Our really special friendship.

I fell off my chair because  of Dan coming to the door and yelling shit. I wanted to show him the video on his birthday and in the end i wanted to tell him I liked or even well loved him.  Because,because i fancied him from the second i saw him out of that train. Now I'm here waiting for Dan to come and shout at me. How he will never love me and how he only wanted to be friends. And even if he was gay wouldn't want to date a waste of space like me. I stood back up and started searching again.

"Where is it!" I mumble searching through the cabinets."ah, found it" I said and my body tensed up as I looked at the blade that had a little blood on it. I lifted the hem of my shirt and put the blade against my skin. I hissed in pain as the blade cut my skin. As the blood was running down my stomach I started to feel dizzy. I heard the door open and Dan ran in. 

I hit the floor and heard the door open last thing i saw was Dan hugging me and screaming " Why did you do this Phil don't leave me I lo.." and then darkness.

Dan POV

I walked into Phil's room. He was actually editing. I looked at the computer screen it looked like a a normal video. "Is this really my birthday present. Really a fucking video, we do this for a living and I was hoping for a t-shirt or something. Really Phil a video. Ugh knew it he was too laxy to get me a normal gift." I stormed out of the room. I stumbled to the bathroom door "Phil come out you twat". All i heard were silent sobbs. Was he really crying about me seeing a video. Really..

I suddenly heard some rustling. it was like he was looking for something. Oh shit was he..no please don't say he was going to do it. I hastily ran to the kitchen where i knew we had a spare key for the bathroom. I need to stop him.

"Phil be alright when I open this door" I whipered to myself. I unlocked the door and ran to Phil. He was bloody. There was too much blood. "Phil why did you do this? Don't leave me! I need you! I love you" I started crying myself.I can't lose my bestfrind. I just can't. If I lose him I have no-one. I don't talk to my family much. Other youtubers think we are out casts too. I'm all alone. If he dies it's all my fault. I see the blade he had in his hand.

The metal blade was bloody and it looked old. I guess he had been doing this for a while. I took a towel and tried to clean the floor of his blood and some paper to clean off the wounds. There were scars that were starting to fade. I guess he wasn't doing this for a while. He was always so happy but I guess I was wrong. 

I always wanted him to happy because he always keeped me happy. All I need is him. The man who helped me through a really hard phase. I guess if he's not going to stop me but I need to patch him up. I get some gause and wrap it around him and try to pick him up. "fuck he's heavy" I grunt as I pick him up and carry him bridal style. 

I gently put him on his bed and walk to the back to the bloody mess that is the bathroom. I slumped down on the floor crying and thought "He would probably be better off without me. I only cause him pain and it would be easier for me too. I'm a really shit friend." I take the balde and slide my sweat pants down to reveal older scars and cuts.

I inhale deeply and make the first cut "Ah fuck" I hissed in pain. I looked at the blood flowing slowly down my thigh. "I missed you" I sigh. This is the only way I can keep myself from going mental. I need an escape sometimes and this is the best way. I'm nearly twenty and I already want to die so bad. "I'm sorry Phil. It's all my fault" I press the blade to my skin one last time as it goes in quite deep "Shit, ow, no wait I can't pass out" I try to stand up and walk to the door. But when I stand up I slam my head into the edge of the sink and 'Boom' everything's black.