ochlophobia ↳ jjk

하나

난 숨쉬고 싶어

비 나나

i let out a sigh.

it seemed that these days that was all i did. the weather outside wasn't all that good, rainy and cloudy just like it had been for a good two weeks. what was the point of autumn if the pile of leaves would end up soaked in the end? i missed my childhood.

it was nearly silent in the classroom all except that pencil tapping the desk somewhere. i parted my eyes from the window and returned them to the exam that sat still on my desk, untouched. time was almost up and all i had managed to fill out was the name box. my attempt at actually studying this time had failed.

my gaze drifted across the room. my classmates, all deep in concentration, didn't spare me a glance. sunsaeng noticed my blank stare and scolded me with her eyes. i immediately returned my gaze to the exam. i was bound to fail.

"you have ten minutes left, class."

i had zoned out for a while. sunsaeng's voice managed to spit me back into reality. i began to panic. dammit, what was this exam for again?

i took my pencil between my fingers and placed it on the paper, studying the questions while brushing my hair from my face. the first problem displayed a long equation with the number pi tucked in between a few numbers several times.

when did we learn this? must've been a day i stared into space, counting the numberless stars.

"five minutes."

my heart rate increased. like a sudden reflex, i scribbled down what i deemed appropriate for the solution, or what i thought looked the most correct. problem after problem, i wrote answer after answer. i never second guessed myself because i knew they were all wrong.

"time," sunsaeng glanced across the quiet room, "please turn in your exams."

my pencil dropped with a breath. shaky hands gripped at the incomplete exam. another grade bites the dust, another score to disappoint my parents, just another day living as myself.

"bi nana," the look on sunsaeng's face gave me extreme discomfort as i handed her my exam. i could tell she knew just how bad of a score i'd receive, even if she hadn't seen my test already.

distracting her with a bow, i slipped out the classroom. clearly i was unaware of the crowd in the hallways. my ignorance of rushing blindly through the packed hall sent me crashing into a stranger straight on. i huffed as i hit his chest. my butt hit the floor before i had the chance to balance myself.

"sorry," i muttered, keeping my eyes down. my face felt hot from embarrassment.

"don't be," his feet shuffled slightly, "it was my fault."

he sounded uncomfortable. i could tell by his voice he wanted to disappear from this hallway as much as i did. expecting he would leave, i flinched in surprise when his hand appeared in front of my face. i sat frozen on the floor, only staring at his offered hand. long fingers showed off an arrangement of silver rings. a small chain hung loosely on his wrist, peeking out from under his uniform sweater.

he coughed and waved his hand slightly in my face, "are you going to take it or..."

i blinked a few times back into reality. i zoned out a lot, i really needed to get my head out of the clouds.

"sorry," there i went again with my pitiful apologies.

as uncomfortable as i felt, i took the stranger's hand, my eyes not faltering from his shoes. he pulled me to my feet with ease as if i weighed equal to a feather. that over calculation of force caused me to once again crash onto his chest. i muttered an apology as i stepped back.

"you okay?"

i met a pair of doe eyes. very deep dark brown pupils and a wide white of his eyes, making his eyes look bigger than most. his lips were agap, an eyebrow raised in question as he studied me carefully. i immediately recognized him. you could only find those brown eyes and heart shaped lips on one boy, that boy being the most popular in our school. damn you jeon jungkook.

"yeah, i guess," my eyes broke away from his. heat travelled its way to my cheeks.

he chuckled, "are you sure, nana?"

how the hell did he know my name?

"pretty damn sure," i gasped when i heard myself curse, old habits die hard.

i heard him laugh again, "why are you in a rush?"

another question? this boy really did want to talk, "i wanted to-i don't know, get out of this place."

i didn't hear him respond. slowly, i looked up to see him staring at me silently. originally i planned to come across an empty space, a missing boy that had escaped from talking to me again. he was still there, what a shocker.

"me too."

i zoned out again, dammit.

"i hate this hallway, there are too many people," he shuddered slightly, "i hate crowded places."

i nodded. the corners of my lips jumped up for a moment in attempt to form a smile but they dropped soon after. i didn't say anything nor move for a while. i'm guessing that made him uncomfortable from the way he shuffled back and forth on his heels, i could see his chest rising higher and higher as time passed. every time someone would accidentally bump into him, his eyes would dart to that person and widen. slowly, he inched closer to the lockers.

"jungkook?" was he alright?

"i have to go."

without another word, the boy disappeared into the crowd. i stood there frozen. what just happened? did he feel fine? i'd never seen jungkook, mister perfect boy, act any other way than-well perfect.

after a minute of thinking, i shrugged it off. he probably had somewhere to be, i was just a waste of time.

oh well.

screw this place, i'm out. all i needed then was my bed, a warm blanket, and a cup of shrimp noodles.

i rolled back my shoulders to fix my bad posture and pushed my way through the crowd.

{ a.n

- i hope you enjoy this short ff.

}