Lilted

Schizotypalschizoid

They couldn't tell if the shadow in the corner of their eye was theirs or not
Their schizo script told them to scream to run to fight to cry
Paralysis was the symptom that made sleepers fear for their lives made them weep for freedom to move their appendages to be released from this jailing of movement
They were scared, fearful and they couldn't cry out for someone to save them from the torment that their mind gave them save them from their heightened senses caused by the fear that was brought on from the shadows all around them now behind them now beside them now
It was a concerning thing to be a child and see things that no one else could see and that's how it all started for them it was frightening it was horrifying all of the above and nobody could help them because nobody was around just shadows just the monsters under their bed just the startling jolt that they had when they came and when they didn't come
They were planning something they were tricking you when nothing happened for too long it was a trap and itmadethemwanttoriptheireyesfromtheirsockets and it was an overwhelming paranoia that something was lurking in the darkness that something was behind them or right next to their ear whispering lookbehindyou and it didn't stop it never stopped never ending torture that would've been outlawed in the medieval times it would make you shudder at the very thought of it made you shiver with a fear so great you wouldn't be able to forget it would make empathy (schizoids were tragic with a capital T, wouldn't wanna be you) be reincarnated into a form that had been lost years ago and forgotten along with fairness and the feeling of fitting in with society
Eventually they were left by themselves to grow into their adolescent years and of course it never went away (it never went away because that would be too easy wouldn't it?) it developed into something more than just monsters under the bed more than creaky doors and the feeling that you weren't alone in a room of course all of that stayed it just got worse than a child's nightmares it turned into real people that they feared people that they hadn't had the luxury of having and themself a twisted version but it was still them telling you everything that you had done wrong everything flaw in your personality in your body in your mind telling you what you should and shouldn't do because they could and they wouldn't stop (it never stops) because it gets you and it never gives you back and why would it when it could just keep you in your cage so easy to pick on not so easy to get out all you have to do is decipher what is and isn't real they could never do that the shadows were too overwhelming and the cushioned walls were always a comforting home that had always been there and it had always given a support when nobody else had and it was sad and it was lonely but when they deemed you sane enough for the real world you lost your only friend and you lost your only comfort and you were forced out into the real world where nobody else saw shadows and nobody else heard things whispered into their ears and your next dose of medication was due in two hours and you had to remember to eat and drink and sleep and it was unbearably hard when you couldn't tell if your food was okay to eat or if spaghetti was actually a pile of trash and you didn't have much money and you needed a job and you had already been fired from several (and it was so hard)
They needed calm and they needed peace and they needed sleep
And they would get that but not so temporary and pretty permanent and you can't get a refund for this ticket and they had wanted this for so long and they felt so old and so aged and so relieved that it was almost over (and it's never ending isn't it?) and they needed to take their medication and they would and maybe they would just take a little too much and not so little and the shadows would be gone not so temporarily and it would be pretty permanent (and they never really go away do they?) and in your final moments they whisper to you they whisper in your ear (once a schizo always a schizo) and your vision goes fuzzy and a ringing starts in your ears and the shadows crowd around you and they stretch their dark masses over you under you beside you andtheywerecarriedawayyouwerecarriedaway (and it never stops)