Standing Alone

Chapter 2: Smooth Sailing

Now my family is not the best you could say. I have two moms and two dads. I live mostly full time with my biological father and step mother, his third wife. I visit my real mom and step dad during the summer. I have a brother and sister at my mom's and at my dad's two brothers and two sisters. The day I told my friend the truth about me I told my step mother that I wanted to cut my hair like a boy. She said okay and the next day when we went out shopping she took me to get it cut. I even saw a lesbian couple at the hair salon, that just boosted my confidence, just knowing my people, the LGBT community is out there made everything feel ten times easier. After my hair cut I felt amazing. I looked into the mirror and for the first time ever I actually recognized myself. It's hard to explain the feeling, but it was like I could actually see myself. Before I didn't want to look at myself. To me I looked...wrong, not how I should. But now, I was me. I just went through this sort of phase were I tried to look like a girl more. I didn't wear make up or dresses and skirts still but I wore girl shirts and pants that hugged my butt, you know the ones. I did my hair a bit and even had a boyfriend. It was painful, that phase. I didn't feel comfortable in my own body at all. So when I cut my hair I dug out all my regular clothes and started dressing like me again. It felt so good. I think it was actually the first Thursday after I cut my hair that I asked Rose out, she said yes. I was sailing now. I looked how I wanted, started acting how I wanted, being called what I wanted by my friends, I even had a girlfriend who didn't mind my changing. She too was so supportive about it. During our relationship, we even talked about how we'd have kids and how she doesn't hate me for not being able to give her kids in that sense, everything was going great. Then, one day my step mom confronted me.