Window to Window [Rewriting 1/24]

3

Yoongi's POV//

Sweat was dripping from my fading, grey hair and down into my eyes. I sat up, panting out all the air in my lungs. I shot a quick glance at the clock and of fucking course, it's 5 am. I knew this feeling all too well, it was a panic attack, I hadn't had one since I was seventeen though. That feeling of déjà vu didn't exactly help as I felt my vision blur and the room starting to spin.

An inaudible - imaginative if you like - scream left my throat as I flung myself over the edge of my bed and gasped for air. I started panicking even more at the thought of my mum running in because she'd heard my scream (that again, didn't actually come out as a scream, but as a helpless huff of air). I searched for the light switch to the lamp on my bedside table and managed to knock down a glass of water and two books in the process.

I stood up on wobbly legs and thanked God for my private bathroom because I don't know if I'd made it down the stairs. I stumbled over the floor, trying to catch my breath and stop the cold sweat from running down my temples. When I finally opened the bathroom door with shaky hands I almost fell down on the floor out of pure exhaustion. It took all the willpower I had to open the mirror cabinet and search for the white container.

Fortunately enough my mother hadn't cleaned out the cabinet when I moved out so it stood in the same spot as I'd put it last time. I felt myself tremble at the sight of the blue pills. I took one out and carefully shook it, observing the small beads inside of it bounce around. I remembered why I had to stop with these, not only did my panic attacks disappear at eighteen, but I got addicted to the pills. That was also one of the reasons why my mum forced me to move out, that and she was quite sick of taking care of my ass.

I slowly put one of the blue pills on my outstretched tongue and looked intently in the mirror as my mouth engulfed it and as my Adam's apple bobbed when I swallowed it. I felt dizzy, not yet feeling the effect of the pill, and sat down to calm my nerves. I turned the container in my hand and tilted my head to look at it in a different perspective.

One more couldn't hurt.

hey, a short little update

next chapter will be quite intense

bye my nuggets