Window to Window [Rewriting 1/24]

12

he's so Rude

3rd person //

Yoongi hated it, he absolutely despised it, the feeling in his chest and his whole body as Jimin's fucking perfect lips had touched his own. Yoongi hated that he so desperately wanted to kiss him back, the way Jimin's fingers moved through his hair and how it made him weak to the knees despite him not even standing up; Yoongi hated how he was too selfish and too stupid to see that he'd hurt Jimin by reacting in the way that he did. Maybe if he'd kissed him back Jimin wouldn't have walked away?

Yoongi sat on his bed, feeling selfish and hopeless, though the way he was acting right now wasn't any less selfish than anything he'd done in the past. His mother came up to his room, she was going to ask him how he was feeling, but she saw, so she sat down beside him and gave him a hug. The way only mums can. "It's going to be alright, darling." She tucked his head under her chin and continued to hug him closely.

"Mummy?" Yoongi spoke up with a quiet voice, he hadn't spoken for the whole day yesterday - and same goes for today - in fear of making himself cry.

"Yes angel, what is it?" She gently pushed him off her shoulder, just enough to get a proper look at him while he spoke.

"I- what if- what would you say," He let out a little sniffle and he could feel his eyes watering up already, he closed his eyes in a desperate try to avoid the inevitable. "How would you feel if I told you that I'm... gay?" He whispered out the word and bit down on his bottom lip before turning away from his mother in order to hide his broken down state.

There was a long silence, a way too long silence in Yoongi's taste. "Honey, are you alright?" She still had a hand on his back and she tried to make him turn back around but to no avail, he wouldn't let himself break in front of her, and he just might if he looked at her.

"I'm- just answer the question." He said hurriedly, getting closer and closer to letting the tears fall with every second passing. She hummed and leaned back a bit, probably thinking about it. Which was better than immediate rejection, Yoongi supposed.

"Well, I wouldn't mind, would I?" She rubbed small, soothing circles on Yoongi's back. "Do you really think I'm that horrible?" She laughed, and Yoongi released something between a chuckle and a sob. "It's not that big of a deal, is it? I mean, I like guys, so why can't you?" She smiled warmly and continued to soothe him with little back rubs, Yoongi finally looked back up at her and he smiled. "Because I'm guessing this is you, 'coming out'?"

"I think so." He nodded and tried to wipe away the tears on his cheeks the best he could, but they still felt damp and cold after.

"And I'm guessing that this has something to do with that Jimin of yours? And that Jimin has something to do with you being all gloomy suddenly?" She did the mum thing where she read him like a book, she could tell - just by looking at him - exactly what was wrong and who she had to hurt.

"Yeah, I mean- yeah." He nodded again and made himself look at something else other than his mother for a second to gather his thoughts, or maybe he was a tiny bit scared of the murderous undertone in her look?

"Do you want to talk about it? Did he hurt you?" She went from sounding so very soft and caring to sounding like she was ready to cut a bitch in 0.2 seconds, and it made Yoongi chuckle.

"No, no mum it's fine, I... I think I'm the one who hurt him." He closed his eyes again and sighed, deeply.

His mum let out a little 'oh' and continued to tell him how Jimin 'probably deserved it' or how it 'probably wasn't that bad', but Yoongi dismissed her every time and said that, no, it was his fault and his fault only. "Then why don't you apologise, dickwad?" She smacked his shoulder (not too carefully) and Yoongi cursed under his breath. "Language!"

"Hypocrite," He whispered but denied that he had said anything when she asked him. "And because, mum, I have social anxiety and I'm probably going to cry if I ever talk to him again and he probably hates my guts now. That's why." She nodded and stood up. When Yoongi asked what she was doing she said that before he fixes this, there is no walking outside of his room and no dinner. 

Yoongi sighed as he could hear her lock the door from the outside and her walking down the stairs. He didn't really feel like eating, but he knew that he had to leave his room eventually, so basically, he had no other choice than to talk things out with Jimin.

It was either A: talking to him over the phone, or B: trying his very best to get over to Jimin's room using the window.

And Yoongi really didn't like talking on the phone.

hey y'all, a quickie for you

it's basically filler shit but whatever

I have school tomorrow (it starts tomorrow) so I'm just making sure I have an update before all of the school bullshit comes and takes up all of my time.

thank you for reading!