Forward to the Past [Steggy] ✔

Chapter Three

Peggy's POV

Flashback

"Peggy?"

I feel a hand rest on my shoulder, and I shake my head, tears streaming down my face.

"Peggy." The voice comes again, more forceful this time.

"Go away, Howard," I choke out, and Howard's hand slides off of my shoulder as I stare blankly ahead of me. Steve is gone. Gone.

"I'm sorry, Peg." Howard says softly, pain etched in every bit of his words. "I'm so sorry. I know what he meant to you-"

"No you don't," I say, shaking my head. "There's so much more than you know. I love him."

No.
I'd loved him.
He's gone.
Forever.

...............

"A whiskey, please," I say to the barman, who gives me a strange look as he pours the strong alcohol into the glass. "Thanks," I say as he hands it to me, then bring it to my lips and down some of it, the flavor burning my throat and leaving a horrible aftertaste. But it starts warming me, and I drink the rest of it in one gulp and hold up a hand to show I want another.

The barman hands another glass to me, still looking concerned. "You alright, miss?" He asks, and I nod, though that's not true in the least sense. I miss Steve too much. We'd planned a dance. For today, at this exact time.

I stare around at the crowded bar, the bright orange lights shining dimly through the pale fog that seems to be permanently suspended over everything. The people here don't give off a particularly "nice" vibe; the people at bars never do. But I had to come here. To get my mind off of everything. But I can't. There's no chance that I could possibly abandon all of the scattered thoughts in my brain. Thoughts of Steve.

"What's a beautiful woman like you doing in a dump like this?" A rough voice says from next to me, and I turn my head to see a burly guy sitting next to me, his shirt partially unbuttoned. He smirks at me, showing a crooked smile with a missing tooth. "Whaddaya say you and I have a dance?"

"What do you say I punch you in the face and you go home with another missing tooth?" I snap back, and the man laughs, snatching a beer from the counter and taking a swig.

"Ah, we've got a feisty one here. i And English. I like you. I'm gonna dance with you."

"I have a boyfriend," I lie, holding my head high. "His name is Steve and he could kill you in two seconds if he wanted to. But he's a good man and you don't have the position to be hurt by such a good man as he is." My voice cracks at the end of my sentence, betraying me, and the man chuckles.

"You ain't got a boyfriend, sweetheart. At least, not here. Your 'Steve' ain't here to protect you."

"I don't need protection, you little-" I start, but the man sneers and interrupts me.

"I'm sure you don't, sugar. That's what I like about the feisty ones. They're more fun to play with." The man reaches forward to take my hand, but I slap his arm away, shaking with a mixture of anger and the affects of the alcohol.

"Don't cross me," I snarl, drawing a few nervous glances from the people sitting around me. "I'm not going to ask again."

The man looks angry now, and he stands up slowly, his stool screeching across the floor. The rest of the bar goes dead silent, watching.

"Oh?" The man says in an eerily calm voice. "And what's someone lie you gonna do against a guy like me?"

"I- I have everything you don't." I stand up as well, the man, who must be at least six foot four, towering over me. "I've got kindness, someone who loves me, and-" I look him up and down, from his crooked nose to his missing tooth- "good looks," I finish, causing the group around us to stifle laughs.

The man scowls at me, his face turning a deep shade of scarlet. "You're going to pay for that, sugar. I know you are."

"No, I'm not," I say confidently, raising a fist in front of my face. "You are." A look of surprise crosses over the man's ugly face before I send my knuckles flying into his jaw. His head flies back, and he stumbles, a collective gasp emitted from the crowd around us.

"That's for insulting me," I say harshly, then punch him again in the eye. "And that's for insulting my boyfriend." Shaking my hand out, I gather my things and walk away, the crowd parting and letting me exit.

I shove the doors open, fighting back sudden tears as I hail a taxi and choke out my address. The drive home is short but seems like hours as I try not to sob.

I still can't believe Steve is gone. Completely gone. I remember being so completely surprised by Steve's determination, but I think what really made me fall in love was the fact that he was kind to anyone he met. Even if he was only a ninety pound shrimp and everyone thought he wasn't good enough. I know I thought he was good enough. A man like him could do anything if he put his mind to it.

The taxi stops in front of my apartment building, and I pay the driver quickly and run to my apartment, finally letting the tears spill down my cheeks as I unlock the door and collapse onto the couch, dissolving in sobs.

They say you don't know how much you love something until it's gone. I knew I'd felt more than friendship for Steve, but I'd never really realized how much of a difference he'd made in my life. How foolish was I to believe that maybe I could keep him in my life? How selfish would it have been to make him stay?

As I slowly calm myself down, I become fully aware of the emptiness in my chest. I miss Steve so much it actually hurts. I'd give everything just to stare into his bluish green eyes again.

But he's gone.