opia; matty healy.

4%

"So, Isabel," George says, "Usually we go to Matty's on a Wednesday night and watch movies all afternoon? You wanna join?"

We're sat in the lunchroom at Erica and her friend group's usual table. Her friends are nice enough to include me in their conversation, and it hasn't seemed forced either. When I showed up at the beginning of lunch they were already arguing about which Spiderman franchise was the best.

"Isabel, good! We need another opinion- Tobey Maguire was the best Spiderman, right?" Chelsea asked, leaning over the table as she spoke passionately about the topic.

I furrowed my brows and looked at her, "I wouldn't know. I haven't seen any."

Matty faked being offended while they shouted at me, telling me I have to watch it. "Right now!" They said as I laughed. Now, George asks me about their supposed Wednesday afternoon antics at Matty's.

"Sure," I shrug when he invites me, "I've got nothing better to do."

"Why do I feel like a second choice right now?" Matty asks solemnly beside me.

"Don't worry," I say, "You're all second choice to me."

It feels strange joking around like this with people I've known for a day and a half. Matty and I already seem to get along with our mutual sense of humour, but as I speak I'm not too sure how the rest of the table will take it. I'm reminded instantly, with the panic inside my chest, that moving too fast in the beginning of a friendship could potentially be diabolical.

I wait not even a second before they laugh. They don't seem offended or upset with my comment, as I've been adjusted to in the past. I sit back with a shy smile, going back to my food before me. Matty eyes me curiously as I look towards him.

"What?" I inquire, still chewing half my food.

"Nothing," He shakes his head.

"Matty's just upset 'cause he's usually the funny one, but now that you're here we get two Matty's!" Erica speaks with a sarcastic smile dripping with a playful tone as she picks at her lunch and shrugs.

"Why do I feel like that's not a good thing?" I laugh, tilting my head to the side in question.

"Hey!" Matty interjects, "More of me is always a good thing. The world should be filled with me's!"

George reaches across the table and grabs Matty's hand, "Matthew," He speaks sternly, "We've talked about this. You're getting cocky again."

Matty pulls his hand away and rolls his eyes as the rest of the table laugh. I don't quite understand Erica's previous comment and whether she was serious that Matty is the funny one in the group – if there even is a funny one – because frankly, I'm finding that they all match my humour quite well. Although Matty perhaps a little bit more, but then again I wonder if it's only because he's got the looks and the smile.

Erica and I walk to our next class together after lunch. She seems a little sulky but I don't inquire as to why she seems this way. I remember to keep my barriers up and not let myself be overly kind when I don't quite know the person yet. Sure, Erica is a nice girl and I think we get along, but almost all of my previous friends also appeared this way in the first week.

An ugly feeling creeps upon me, an uneasy and anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach as I think about losing any more friends. I can't help but imitate Erica's expression and demeanour, suddenly sinking back into my seat and keeping to myself. The teacher assigns partner work but neither of us are putting a heap of effort into the task at hand.