paper thin (phan)

n i n e

fanart by @runningoutoftime_

Dan wakes up to his phone ringing. He expects it to be Phil, although instead it's a random number. He hesitates before answering, raising the device to his ear. "Hello?"

"Daniel?"

It's a woman's voice. Dan's confused. "Who i-is this?"

The line is silent and Dan's anxiety is thumping in his chest.

"Dan, I'm your mother."

And suddenly Dan wished he didn't answer. He felt sick, he wanted to throw up, he wanted to end the call, but everything in him is screaming that he had to say everything he's wanted to say. He wanted to ask why, he wanted to ask where she is, he wanted to ask why she's calling and how she got his number and if she's alright, but all that comes out is:

"What do you want?"

His response came out a lot harsher than he intended, but really she deserved it. At least that's what Dan thought at the moment.

"I want to see you."

"Why now?"

"Because I'm ready to talk."

"You're ready? I'm fifteen- you've had fifteen years to say something a-and you do now. Did my parents call you or something and tell you about what happened? You're pitying m-me, aren't you? Well, if you stuck around, you'd know that this w-was a normal thing."

"Please, Daniel. I've talked to your parents about it and they're okay with it. They think it's time you met your real mom."

"Real mother," he corrected. "You're n-not my mom, and you never will be." Dan hung up. His dad stood in the doorway, eyebrows raised. "I have to see her, don't I?"

"You don't have to do anything, Dan. But don't you want answers to the questions you've been asking all your life?"

"But what if they're not the a-answers I want?" Dan retorted. His father sighed.

"That's the risk you're gonna have to take," he responded. "It's just dinner at her house, only you two. Your mom and I will pick you up when you're ready, but this is completely your decision. So: yes or no?"

Dan exhaled and then spoke up.

"I'll go."

❦

When Dan arrived, he wanted to go back. Not because he felt scared, but just because he was scared of saying the wrong thing or his mother saying the wrong. He stood in front of the house, heart pounding and legs wobbly. He was right in front of the door, fist raised and ready to knock. And Dan knocked. And the door unlocked. And his mother appeared.

Dan froze in place.

He realized then how alike they looked, how he was never compared to his stepparents' looks but could easily be a twin to his mother if spotted together.

She had long, curly chocolate locks, a nervous grin on her pursed lips. She had big, brown eyes like Dan's- a dimple denting her cheek. Dan wanted to reach out and run his fingertips across her face, feel the resemblance between the two, feel the genes and structure passed down, but instead he stood there like a statue.