Unforgiven Mistakes

Understanding

Normal. What is normal?? Do I have a normal family?? No, I don't have any family. I have extended family, but that's as close as I can get to family without blood relation. I will never have normal. I will never be normal.

"I love them. Thank you." I said slipping off my new shoes.

"Well you haven't stopped looking at them in the down town store window since a couple of weeks ago, so we thought you would love the idea of a small gift for your birthday." Jack came out with plates that held a lot of food.

"I love you guys." I said pulling jack down to Jim and I's level. We hugged for a bit then started to eat together.

"Chastity, you know you can talk to us about things. We are here for more than you think." I stopped eating at looked at the kooky men I call my dad's. They both cocked their head to the side and smiled at me awkwardly.

"I know." I smiled politely at them.

"So what is on your mind??" Jim asked me. Harry.

"Erm, just this amazing meal!" I took another huge bite. They knew I was shutting them out. I do this to everyone. Everyone I care about gets put in a dark place with me. People in this place just don't understand. They don't understand relationships, they don't understand feelings, they don't understand being understanding, and most of all no one understands me. My own parents, guardians don't get me at times. I don't expect anyone too.

"Did you hear about the new neighbor we are getting??" Jack asked Jim. I choked on my food and looked at him.

"Chastity, you ok??" He asked.

"Yeah. What do you know about these neighbors??" I asked him curiously. People move out of Woodsbrook, people don't move in.

"They are only staying until they find something more suitable. They are going to live on the better side of town though, not too close to us, actually behind your house chastity. Better side of town just behind us." Jack clarified.

"Interesting. Do you know ages, kids to babysit, details??" I asked.

"Well there are two people moving in, older people, but they have a kid. I heard he was 19." He informed us.

"Hey that's someone you could talk to Chas." Jim pointed out.

"Why would I want to talk to anyone when I have you guys??" I asked hugging them both.

"Chas you know its gets boring with us. Hell I get bored with us." Jack laughed whilst taking our empty plates.

"Look, I don't need someone to get close to me. I don't want someone to get close to me. I like right where I am." I lied. I hate where I am, if I could go back in time and redo one thing in my life it would be the night I told Harry to leave. Maybe then I wouldn't be so secluded, I'd be open and I would love people. I might even love myself. I let everything fall out of place and I don't even have enough in my life to try to piece it back together.

"Chas, we know how you feel but you need to talk to someone. You are a hermit and talking to someone about your age isn't a bad thing." Jim said.

"Are you trying to get rid of me??" I cocked an eyebrow at them.

"We just think you need someone to spend time with. Soon you'll be 18 and on your own. We will always be here for you, but I'm sure you will want other people too. We are just looking out for you." Jim said standing up next to Jack.

"I need to go home." I said looking through them to the clock that was on the wall.

"Ok, do you want me to walk you??" Jack asked.

"I live right next to you. I'll just cut through the yard." I said standing up to meet them in hugs. As Jack shut the door I heard Jim say 'good job, you scared her off.' I smirked to myself. I don't need anyone around me. There is no drama, no problems, and no one else to blame when I mess up. I unlocked my front door and took a look into my dimly lit house.

Everything was grey or black and there was half a living room. I only had a 10 inch TV and one small love seat. The TV was on the table I eat at for breakfast, lunch, and sometimes dinner. I didn't have luxury or a life. I blew out the candles that were lighting the room and I slowly slumped to my room. This room has been my room ever since I was born. When I was in a crib, still this was my room. Nothing has changed besides the baby pink paint chipping and the bed I sleep in is just a mattress on the floor. I had to sell my bed framing to get money. I had to sell everything, even my emotions. There was a point in time I was selling more on myself than in the house. I don't do that anymore, because if I were to lose what little I had left I know that Jim would rent me his room.

I heard a noise, like something had fallen off a table. I froze. Was someone in my house?? Of course someone is in my house! What else would make that noise?? I grabbed a fork from the kitchen and went to investigate. I slowly opened my bedroom door watching my back. Jim used to teach defense classes on Wednesdays so I got some free teachings afterwards. Once the door hit the wall I knew whatever made that noise wasn't behind it. I looked around my room; it was too dark to see. I had a lamp without a lamp shade on my desk I could turn on. Do I really want to?? I slowly crept to the lamp and flicked the light on. I slowly turned around and my mouth gaped open.