Mad Hatter // Phan AU

Nineteen

Headaches. What a fun thing to wake up to.

I sat up immediately only to bump heads with someone else.

"Ow, fuck!"

"At least we know he's awake."

I blinked a few times before seeing Chris, PJ and Phil surrounding me. I sat up and saw I was in the back of my car.

"Nice to see you're alive, thanks for hitting me," Chris said.

"I didn't mean to. What happened?" I asked and felt pain in my jaw.

Right. The fight.

"Well, you passed out after the guy hit you. You didn't break anything but we think you should get checked." PJ said and I shook my head.

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You were hit pretty hard-"

"I'm fine." I repeated. "You guys should be home. What time is it?"

"It's nearly two."

Shit.

Without another word, I got back into the drivers seat and began to drive, dropping PJ off first, then Chris and leaving Phil for last in hopes he'd speak up, say something about what happened, anything.

I parked in his driveway and waited before turning to face him. He showed no signs of moving or getting out of the car but he finally took a breath and spoke.

"You didn't have to do anything." he muttered and for some reason, anger filled me and I balled my hands into fists.

"Phil, I was just trying to help you." I said, trying to keep my voice even and at a reasonable level.

"It wouldn't have mattered, I was already going to get beaten up."

Furiously, I punched the steering wheel and got out of my car, slamming the door shut and standing there with nothing to do. I couldn't be in the car anymore, I couldn't be there anymore.

I stood outside for a few minutes before realizing how cold it was outside and just as I turned around to get back into my car, Phil walked out and stood in front of me.

"I'm sorry."

I wanted to laugh in his face then cry and at the same time I wanted to yell at him but I also wanted to pull him into my arms and tell him it was okay because I knew he was going through a lot.

"All I wanted to do was help!" I shouted and began crying. "All I ever want to do with you is help."

I was breaking again, I could feel myself tear apart and god, it hurt. Everything hurt. It was too much and I felt weak, I wanted to collapse and cry. Cry until I had nothing in me but the emptiness I used to carry around with me before I met Phil. Before I met the boy that changed everything the way Theo did. I didn't want it to happen again. But here I was, breaking again.

To my surprise, he ran to me and wrapped his arms around my tightly.

"I know you want to help but this isn't easy, please just bear with me, okay?" he said gently before taking my face in his hands and wiping away my tears.

I didn't want to look at him but I looked anyways because I knew I wanted to, I knew I wanted to see his blue eyes and soft expression.

"I'm sorry things aren't the best. I'm sorry for getting upset and saying things, I just don't know what to do anymore." he continued. "Thank you for standing up for me as well. I'm sorry you got hurt."

I shook my head but cried more and he pulled me in for another hug and even after being mad at him earlier, I felt safe there. I couldn't be mad at him. Not for long, at least.

"I don't want her to hurt you," I said quietly. "Not anymore. You mean so much to me."

"I know. Can we please not talk about it? I don't want to be here either, please. Can we go?"

I nodded after a moment of silence.

He leaned in to softly press his lips against mine and it was enough to make me feel better.

"Things will get better. This can't last forever." I said.

"I can't wait till it's over."

We stood there for a few seconds, staring at the pavement before we got back into my car.

I drove home, forgetting that I had to face Gran and she wasn't very happy to see me coke home at 2AM with a boy.

"Where have you been? I can do midnight but two? Daniel, what job keeps you working until this time?"

I sighed and kept my face down, remembering that I possibly had blood on my face. "Gran, please. Not now, you can yell at me later."

"Yell at you? No, I want to know what you were actually doing. I know Phil here wouldn't keep you up for that long." she said and walked closer. "Daniel, is that blood on your face?"

So much for trying to hide it.

"It's nothing." I muttered and I didn't know what I expected but it definitely wasn't what came right after.

"You can't just come home with blood on your face and tell me it's nothing! Dan, tell me what you've been doing, I've been worried sick about you ever since he... ever since you lost him and your parents. You can't tell me it's nothing and expect to get away with it. Please, tell me what you've been doing, what is this job you have, I need to know."

And as I opened my mouth to make up another pathetic lie that she wouldn't believe, my phone rang.

It was silent for the longest time and I reached for my phone, glancing at the number before answering.

Oh no.

"Hello?" Please don't be what I think it is.

"Hello, is this Daniel Howell?"

No, please no. "That's me."

"I'm sorry for calling so late but something's gone wrong with your mother."

*****

short shitty parts aYe sorry this sucked omg im trying but I swear next one will be longer and better (╥﹏╥)

I'm such a mess wow

lmao no one cares okay sorry sO I have a question which might seem lame but I don't want to go ahead and do it without your guys' opinions because I write for you guys sO

if I made a sequel to this, would you guys read it? I could make this just one book but for certain purposes, I wanted to make a sequel with more phan pft but would anyone read it?

it's okay if you wouldn't, I just want to know what you guys would like

thank you for reading, voting and commenting, it means a lot to me! i love you all, you're all amazing like Phil and if you ever need anyone, I'm here !

byyeeee