Take me with you....

Maddie

First day back at school, and I'm dreading it.
I hate my school, I hate everyone in it too. I know that sounds awful but, if you came to my school, you would see where I'm coming from. Especially now I have been diagnosed with 'anxiety'. I don't get this whole diagnosing thing. They're basically labelling people who are different to the normal human body. My family and friends have noticed that I was 'different' to everyone else in my school since I even started nursery. But I actually like being different, not following the crowd, being the same as everyone else, it's kinda cool to be different. I don't have any friends at school, or should I say 'real' friends. I of course have my best friend liv, but the rest of them I only hang around with because they are liv's mates. To be truthful I hate all of them.

I take the same route up to liv's house, where her mum would give us a lift to school. "How were your holidays?" Liv asked my clunking her seat belt in. Liv and her family have always been more well off than my family have, and she tends to brag about it a little. "Erm, I stayed in my room pretty much the whole of the summer, I only came down to eat, drink and get my laptop charger" this is all very true, I hate socialising. That probably the facts because I dislike pretty much everyone I know. "Oh, well we went to our villa in Seychelles" this made her holiday sound so much more funner than mine but to be honest, staying in my room, on my own, listening to Coldplay is my ideal way to spend my time away from hell.

When we pulled up to the school, I kinda had to brace myself. Anxiety+school=BAD. I've only ever had 5 big panic attacks in my life, where I couldn't breathe and I had to go to hospital, I've had about 12 mini ones. That may seem a lot but I'm use to them by now. I drag my feet down the hallway, blank faces walk past me. You meet lots of different people in school, some with piercings, some with brightly coloured hair, some with skirts that far up their arse you can see the knicker line. Where as to them, I'm just another boring face on the corridor. First lesson, history, with the possibly the most ugliest person I've ever seen in my life, he greasy hair, real bad acne, he stinks of BO, and always has sweat marks on his back and arm pits, he goes by then name, mr.wattson. I sit in my usual place, right next to the window, even though we all got a new seating plan, my mum insisted on me sitting next to the window as it would help my anxiety. Ever since we found out I had it, my mum has been so fussy around me, she's even given me a curfew and I'm nearly 17! I mean I don't even go out anyway so it doesn't really matter. My older sisters, Abbie, Elsa and Alexa are all the ideal, normal daughter, who go out shopping every Saturday with their girl friends, get their nails done, go to parties and have boyfriends, with no anxiety. I guess that the down side of having it, you are treated a lot more differently to normal people.

I hardly ever do any work, I just sit gazing out the window, watching each car and person going past. I always wonder were they have been to or where they are going to, how their day has been, or what they are going through. These things im always weirdly fascinated by.

Maddie- Marie Elizabeth winstead
Leo- Dan howell