Carl Grimes Imagines ➹ Smut&Fluff

Missing Something (Extremely Heart-Wrenching Smut) *Part One*

Woah thanks for 100k, this is surreal. Here's an imagine I worked really hard on and really put my heart into. It's a good one.

It's been four years I think.

Four winters have passed without him giving me warmth. He used to hold me close and tell me that I was the flame that kept his cold heart warm and beating.

Four springs have passed without him walking through the blooming flowers with me. He used to tell me that I was more beautiful than all of the flowers in this decaying world.

Four summers have passed without him and I having late night picnics while the fireflies all around us illuminated our smiles. He used to tell me that my smile was brighter than all of the fireflies that ever could bless us with their presence in this dark world.

Three autumns have passed without him and I enjoying the falling leaves and cool winds together under a warm blanket. He used to tell me that he was the luckiest man ever just by having me by his side through every change in the weather, through every change in his mind, through every change.

He used to.

I don't know what happened.

I haven't seen him in four years.

He disappeared on a night just like the ones that seem so normal. Just a filler day that nobody thinks much of. It wasn't cold, it wasn't hot, it was so normal. But after that night, normal was never a concept in these walls.

They stopped looking for him about three seasons ago. We've lost five people since he disappeared, and Rick has come to terms with our sad fate. We'd never see him again, and I think we've all just accepted it. Well, all if you exclude me. I want to know he isn't dead, but honestly that makes me feel even worse.

It means he doesn't want to be back. It means he left on his own.

But, oh God, I miss him so much.

Now, instead of spending my remaining time with my loving Carl, I spend it perched on this lookout.

Watching everything come to the gates, I'll always be hoping that Carl will be in the sea of everything.

The leaves are falling from the trees that stand strong and tall, and it reminds me of him.

"(Y/N)! I'm coming up!"

The ladder shakes as Sasha's head pops into sight.

"Hey Sasha."

She smiles and stands next to me, looking out, "It's been my shift for four hours now, you need sleep. You've been up here forever."

I shake my head, "I like it though. Keeps me busy, I guess."

She sighs, "Rick is worried about you. Everyone is worried about you. It's been a long time, you shouldn't think about it so much. Move on, baby.

"I'm not going to lie, it's going to hurt. I lost my Bob, it hurt. We had such plans, but I lost him. It hurt a hell of a lot, but I had to rise from it. You're strong, you can too."

I give a very small smile, "Thanks Sasha, I appreciate that. I'm sorry."

She shifts her eyes from me to outside of the walls, "It's alright."

She turns to leave, "It's going to be okay."

At that moment, it wasn't clear whether or not she was talking to me or herself.