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Maya stares at me blankly. It's like she wasn't absorbing my insults at all. I'm glad she wasn't because I've been on edge lately and I don't know what I am saying. Since Lucas and Maya sparked a fire back in Texas, I feel like I'm in competion everyday with the girl who's suppose to be my best friend. Sad, right?
"Okay, whatever go. It's just a stupid Carnival." I spit and strut down the hall to my next class, leaving behind my so called friends.
I loved Lucas first, and I know I tell myself I'm okay with this a
rrangement, but I'm not. I'm not okay with physcologically fighting with Maya and my insecurites everyday. I know I'm too skinny and have no cleavage. I know I'm not cinfident and fun like Maya, so why do I stay in a place where it makes all these feelings a million times worst.
"Riley," Farkle is chasing after me now. " hey, are you okay?"
"I'm peachy." I answer.
"Cut the crap. You've been like this since we got back from Texas. Maya and Lucas may be too caught up in Lalaland to see you, but I see you." Farkle states. " And it is tearing me apart, because you' re my friend and I hate seeing you like this!"
"Like what Farkle?Happy? I'm happy for them. Whatever they are." Am I really trying to convince myself this is okay or Farkle? Farkle looks at me like he isn't buying it. He see's right through me. " Do we have to be growing up? Can we go back to the times when all Maya and cared about was Barbies and Ice cream not Cowboy Ken..I just don't understand how it got this bad for me. How..?"
"Because we are growing up wether you like it or not and I don't know how to understand these feelings we're feeling, but I do know we don't lie to each other. We don't lie to each other Riley. You don't lie to me or Maya or Lucas. That's what turned this friendship toxic. Is all the lying and we are toxic as it is. So please, don't contaminate our friendship anymore than it is. Tell them you're hurting. Or we're all gonna get hurt." Farkle pulls me into a long embrace. We were both tired... I'm tired of feeling like this and he's tired of seeing me like this.
Farkle is the only one who seems to have 20/20 vision in this situation.
"I needed this Farkle." I squeeze him back with my arms wrapped tightly around his neck.
"I need you, Riley."

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Hope I'm doing good so far guys xD

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