"Nice of you to finally join us, Tommo," Liam grumbled as I walked through the door. The four of them were lounging out on the sofa. Niall and Harry were battling each other in a game of FIFA while Zayn scrolled on his mobile.
"Relax, daddy, I was just spending some time with my family, s'all," I responded, annoyed by his attitude. I was a grown man. I showed up to the venue on time, whatever the hell I chose to do before so really didn't need to be any of their business. I walked across the room to a chair in the corner and plopped down, automatically hauling out my mobile, not because I was particularly interested in anything on there, but because maybe if I pretended to be focused on something, they'd leave me alone.
"Liar," Harry called me out as his fingers mashed buttons on the controller. His voice was icy, proving their was no sense of joking behind his statement.
"S'cuse me?" I snapped, lowering my phone so I could get a better look at him.
"I was talking to Jay this morning," Harry answered, referring to my mother. He paused the game - receiving a grumble from Niall who was on a break away - and turned to look at me. "She said you didn't leave your room once the entire two days you've been there. You didn't eat anything, hardly even acknowledged your sisters. So don't say you were busy spending time with your family, that's bullshit."
I rolled my eyes, pushing myself up from the chair. "Fuck you, Harry," I hissed at him as I made my way to the door.
"Yeah, fuck you too, Louis," Harry barked back. "How hard is it to answer a god damn phone? I only gave you 13 chances."
"You don't get it," I snapped back, turning to face away from them. I could feel the tears threatening to spill through my eyelids but I refused to let any of them see me cry. My fists clenched at my sides and I took deep breath, trying to keep the swelling emotions in my chest.
"I don't get it?" Harry demanded, standing up now. "You miss her, Louis. I fucking get it, alright, and I swear to god I wish there was something I could do for you. But closing yourself off from your friends and family... The people who care about you, isn't going to make anything easier. Pretending to be strong when you're actuall being pathetic isn't going to change anything. Stop with you're "I don't give a shit about anything or anyone" attitude and admit that you're not okay."
I listened to him, clenching my teeth to stop my lips from trembling. My back was still facing him and I couldn't bring myself to turn around, nor could I bring myself to leave the room. The other lads were completely silent. I think they had been expecting this for a while. They all showed they were worried about me, but they mostly just let me keep to myself. The only time Liam really bothered me was when it was affecting the band. Like the day I refused to get a picture with a group of girls at the airport. He had went off me for a good twenty minutes, telling me how I needed to grow up and start acting my age instead of a spoiled rotten toddler. Other than that, he had pretty much given up on me. They all had, and I was okay with that. I deserved it and it was what I wanted.
But Harry just wouldn't let it go. Maybe it's because we'd always been closer, or that he just missed his best mate. I knew I was hurting him by ignoring his calls and refusing to hangout with him, but he just wouldn't seem to leave me alone. We were always bickering now because of it. It seemed like it was finally escalating. Harry was getting everything out that he'd been sitting on for the past two months.
"You loved Grace and she broke your heart," Harry said, quieter now. "I get it, Louis."
"Shut up, Harry! Just shut up, shut up, shut up!" I screamed, spinning around suddenly. It was one thing for her name to be constantly ringing on my mind, regret causing my entire core to ache as I thought about how much I had loved her. It was another thing to hear the words out loud. "Just shut up, because you don't know anything." With that I quickly left the room, the tears finally welling up and spilling over, tumbling down my cheeks one after another.
