Its December now. The cold winter breeze blows strong. The leaves have fallen and the birds have flown south for the winter. There is no snow on the ground or in the sky, just dead grass and leaves. That's Kansas for you I guess. It seems the colder it is outside the colder I feel inside. There is a giant hole in my life where my mother use to be. The only way to fill it is with a snow ball. A snow ball that is non existing in this world. Each small ball packed together by unique and different qualities of a snow flake. I often spend time pondering Why did this have to happen? Why to her? She was a light in everyone's life. She was a daughter, Sister, Wife, and Mother.
Its July now. There is a hot rush of air. The sun beams show on the pavement, giving off the illusion that the road is farther then it really is. The flowers are at full bloom. There is a wild filed of sunflowers to my left and to my right is a wheat field ready to be harvested. Its hot in my heart. Some times just to hot, like its burning. A untouched passion just wanting to burst. I sit there. In the middle of this road. Starring in awe at the scenery. I start to reflect on my life. I'm so lucky to have a mother like her. She was compassionate, selfless, funny, bubbly, and a nurture. Somewhere along the way, she lost her passion. She lost her fight. I feel it though. I feel a passion of my own. It may not be the same passion she had but its my own.
