Experiment X

Two

      When I woke up, I was in the lab laying on a sofa that I didn't even recognize. But when I felt my thoughts all glowing again and not gurgled I sat up with a pounding headache at the front of my head. Nobody was in the room at the time so it was odd to wake up with faces not looking down at you. Instead be in an empty room.
     I gulped because I could feel myself getting nervous and paranoid. I hate being alone, it terrifies me because I don't know what to do and I hate not knowing. Not because I'm a control freak but I've had so many people around me it's so strange getting used to the silence.
     Propping myself up I looked around the room, knocked on the walls that gave an echo glassy sound. Was this a one way mirror? They can see in but I can't see out?
    I hoped so kind of but I also hoped this was still the lab I think. Did those crazy agent guys take me in my sleep? They couldn't have other wise I would have felt it, right? This is still the lab? Wasn't I with Christine? And the other scientist? Where did Mark go? He was there right? Yeah, yeah he was. What was I doing? Oh yeah throwing up. I feel fine now though.
       I felt myself getting shaky and having a panic attack. I do have anxiety, everyone does. But being in a closed room with no easy exit as it seems defiantly freaks me out like I just want to shut down.
     And this room was so unfamiliar I didn't know what to think of it.
     I felt a cold sweat break out and  my legs felt like jello. I had a hard time breathing and my heart beat was going faster.
     This isn't a dream right? I woke up. I had to. I know I did. Surely I di-.

      I sat up again with sweat beaming on my forehead and shouts of surprise. I was panting and my heart was racing.
    "Ash, Ash!" Said Christine as she snapped her fingers to get my attention, "You're fine, it's alright."
     I felt her arms wrapped around me and she was stroking my face. After a while I noticed my wings were spanned out like I was flying. I folded them up so they pressed against my back.
     I looked around the room and saw all the scientist staring at me like I did something and that sent me into more panic and I totally thought my heart was going to rip out of my chest because it was beating so hard.
    "Calm down, it's just us." She said, "It's just us."
    I propped my head on her shoulder and sighed. She was stroking the feathers of my wings.
    Mark squated down next to us. He had like a pocket flash light and flashed the light in my eyes. I squinted using my forearm to block.
     "He's conscious now, we're making an improvement." He said and stuffed the little flashlight back in his lab coat pocket.
      "I'm what?" I slurred.
       "You passed out and didn't wake up for two whole days. Were you dreaming?" Markus mutteted.
     I then remembered that room I felt like I was locked in and it made me tense up. The thought of being captured and being helpless terrified me.
    "It was like... I was locked in this room. It was small like a closet, it had a sofa and the walls were black. There was no door and it felt so real." I thought out loud.
     "You awake now, and that's all." Christine said.
      "I know... so why the fuck are you still here for??!" I snapped at the scientist.
      "You went into a coma what were we suppose to do?" Said Mark.
       I shook my head. That headache is really starting to get to me. Like every movement it's like something bashing against my head.
     Mark rolled his eyes.
    "We'll be in the living room." He muttered and shut the dorm room behind him.
     I gave him a thumbs up, and then he disappeared behind the door.
     "What's going on with you? You've never been so needy." Christine said still stroking my wings.
    " I have a splitting headache." I said rubbing my temples. I sat up with the peircing pain stabbing me in the head and running down my spine.
     I looked out to window with the sudden urge of wanting to jump out spread my wings and fly. Not fly away but just bring up in the air freely. Not controlled.
    "How's your back?" Christine blurted.
     "Cramped, sore." I said.
    If I dont fly for a certain amount of days my back will cramp. And it sucks because the more days I go on without flying the more it hurts and the worse it gets.
     "How are you feeling?" She asked.
    "Just a headache other wise I'm good." I muttered.
      I looked out the window again. Stormy and raining which of course sent me into a panic because I have a fear of lightning for a really good reason and I get extremely bad anxiety attacks, like I scream, and run everywhere. I know, super embarrassing that a tough guy like me, has a fear of lighting. Luckily Christine knows of my fear, but she doesn't know why.
     A clap of thunder boomed in the air and I scattered shoving myself into a corner of the room and scooting myself closer against the wall.
    "Oh, no, no, no. Ash, Ash!" Christine said as she tried to pull me from my corner.
    I stayed huddled and tensed as she pulled on my arm and I restrained.
     Mark came in the room, "We got a sweet lightning storm coming up her pretty quick."
    I held my hands on my head and my breathing came heavy and fast and my heart started pounding.
     "Nooooo!" I yelled.
    I held my knees against my chest and buried my face in a crease.
     Mark just stared at me which I thought was really offensive.
    "We're heading back to the science ward to analyze some data... call if you need us." Mark said and then shut the door behind him.
     "Shitty excuse." Christine muttered.
    Another clap of thunder louder loomed over our roof and followed by a flash of lighting. At that point I lost it, fled from where I was and climbed inside the stand up dresser that had enough space for me to crawl in and shut the door.
     "No, Ash. Come on out it's fine." Christine begged.
    "No no, I'm fine." I argued back.
     Christine knocked on the wardrobe door and tried forcing it open.
    "Leave me be!" I yelled.
   Another boom of thunder.
  I scream and curl up into a tighter ball and my feathers began to fluff out.
    "Ash you need to get over this fear. Now come out and talk about it." She demanded.
    Oooh she sounds pissed. I pushed open the wardrobe door, grabbed the nearest blanket and wrapped it around me and over my head, then headed back to my corner where I sat down.
     Christine scooted close to me and I opened the blankets up so she could scoot in closer.
    I tensed up, I forgot I wasn't wearing a shirt so I was surprised by her soft touch.
    "Why... I mean you look so tough why lighting?" She asked.
    I sighed, I hate, hate, hate talking about this. But here it goes.
    "Where do I begin... um... well when I escaped that hostpital it was actually during a storm. And I was flying high, looking for somewhere to land, maybe a place to stay. I don't know I was all caught up in the moment from finally escaping that I wasn't paying attention when a lighting bolt hit me right between the wings and down I went." I said.
     Christine laid her head against my shoulder, "Is that how I found you? And that's how you got that scar?"
    I nodded, "Yeah..."
     "We'll you're safe inside. Keep that in mind." She said.
     Kinda hard when you're mind is fucked up. I have so many reasons to hate people. And everyday I wonder what my life would be like if I lived a normal life, like if I had parents and a family. Then I wonder what it would be like if I never had these wings... if I was normal. I would go to school, I could do so many things without being afraid like I am now. I probably wouldn't have to deal with depression. PTS, ADHD, anxiety etc. And I wouldn't have to worry about being hunted down and killed. I don't have to worry about being shot dead as much. There is so much I wish was different and so little things I'm glad to have. It's like I envy the kids that come and go here in the summer for camps. Their parents loved them enough to trust them in having fun. They fucking have parents at the very least.
     A clap of thunder threw me out of my self complaining.
    "See you didn't scream this time. That's something." Christine pointed out.
    "Yeah," I said quickly.
    I got up, spreading out my wings and stretching. It felt nice to stretch but it would feel better if I could actually go out, and fly. Be what I was created to do.
     I threw a shirt on that has slits cut in the back to pull my wings through. As I pulled it over my head I spread out and adjusted my wings through the slits. Once everything made it through, I already had black jeans on.
     "Are you going somewhere?" Christine asked as I was mid way through the doorway.
    I looked over my shoulder, "No..."
    I went back in the room and laid down on the bed with a heavy sigh.
    I felt Christine crawl on the bed and lay beside me, "You're not taking your anti-depressants. I can tell Ash."
    I felt the shake of a plastic medicine bottle with pills inside. They taste discusting by the way. All medicine taste gross that's why I don't take my medications, but Christine always knows.
    I groaned.
     "You're taking these, I don't care if you like them if it helps you then... Suck it up." She said and got my bottle of water.
     I groaned again, sitting up. I took the bottle of pills out of Christine's hands, popped in the amount I needed, and took a quick sip of water and swallowed all in one gulp.
      "Thank you, see it wasn't that bad." Chistine said with a smirk.
    I frowned. As much as I know she's trying to help right now it feels like she's being a mom. I don't care how much she thinks these pills will work you can't erase what happend when I was a kid...
      "Ash, it's obvious your pissed and I know how much you hate this, beleive me I hate trying to get you to do these things because I hate that you're being put through this, but for now it's the only thing we can do. We don't have anywhere to go." Christine muttered.
      I crossed my arms, "I know, I know. I just wish that I, this was normal."
       I felt Christine brush her fingertips along my feathers and messing around with them. I'll admit the wings are badass it's just everything else sucks.
    I glanced out the window, it was sprinkling. Not heavily and I couldn't hear the thunder anymore so I assumed the worst was over.
    I got up, so did Christine. She gave me a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek, "I gotta go to my impovissation classes."
   I nodded, "I gotta go to the Science Ward, to get tortured." I said walking out the doorway of our room.
     "Don't say that." Christine mutterd.
    I turned around and smirked, "Yeah yeah."
     As I was about to leave our Pod Christine caugt up to me as I was approaching the stairs, "Oh no, you're flying your way there." She said and pointed to the doorway to the roof.
     "Course I am." I said with a chuckle.
    Christine disapeared behind the stairway door. I walked down the hallway and opened up the roof door where it lead to a steep stairway behind the door. I skipped a couple steps up and came to another door were it acually lead to the roof.
    When I actually stepped outside, shutting the door behind me. I sped walked over to the edge of the building and looked down. I thought it was higher. Or maybe it's natuaral for people to think that.
    Anyways I leaned over and felt my feet release from the edge of the building and I was falling from a 4 story building. I snapped open my wings and felt the strong push of wind beneath them as I soared higher and higher. My cheeks burned from the sting of the wind.  It was cold so I made it a quick trip. I didnt want to stay out her to long. So I lowered my altitude, dipped down and gave a quick brush up and settled my feet on the roof of the Science Ward.
     The fun was about to begin...