Phenomenal ▹ STYLES [COMPLETED]

• Chapter 20 •

— Later That Same Night —
(Britt's P.O.V.)

AJ made us dinner right here in this hotel room in Hartford, Connecticut, and I feel truly blessed to have him in my life for as long as I have. I wouldn't want anyone else to ever replace him, ever.

After dinner of juicy steak and fries, the laughter and chatter goes down, so we go out to the balcony where the cold, yet peaceful, wind immediately greeted us. It was comforting, to say the least.

"What is that you really want from life?" AJ suddenly asked, turning the direction of the conversation we once had into something very serious.

We weren't looking at each other. Well, he wasn't looking at me, at least. He was looking out into this amazing city and gazing at all of the lights from this far up. So, this gave me plenty of time to think about my proper answer that I would soon give him. Nothing.

"You mean before I hit the big forty?" I inquired, just to make sure if that's what he exactly meant.

He shrugged and only met my eyes for a second before looking away again. It was like he was purposely avoiding eye contact with me. "Well, before you die, I guess."

Oh. Well, I had already told him what I wanted to experience from life. I want marriage, kids of my very own, and ultimately – happiness.

The only part that I didn't tell him was that I wanted to take a year off of wrestling and spend every waking second with him in the house we would have together somewhere in Georgia up in the mountains, hopefully.

So, then, I sighed and finally replied, "I already told you. Marriage, kids of my own, and happiness."

I seen how AJ kind of shifted in his place as where he bit down on his bottom lip, obviously avoiding what would to come of this conversation. All I wanted to know was what the bloody hell was going on deep into his mind right now? Who is AJ right now?

"Britt," he muttered out my name before he turned directly to me and caressed my hands with his, "there's something I need to tell you and it's not going to be easy on me, especially."

Oh, God. What could he have to say now? Whatever it is, it has to be serious. I mean... I'm scared to know at this point. Nevertheless, I nod and give him the go to get on with it.

For a split second, he avoids telling me, where he let's go of my hands and turns away. He stands up and leans over the balcony's ledge. I stand up beside him, too, and watch him and all of his facial expressions.

"I just can't have my best friend as my girlfriend right now," he finally admitted, glaring out at the city in front of us. Although, I couldn't stop looking at his face the whole time. W-What? "Not yet, anyway. I don't think I'm ready for another commitment that's going to end in tragedy once again."

I gulped, only to feel my heart shatter like a glass ceiling after having a baseball bat to it. It takes everything in me to hold back the tears because I have to understand. I have to. "That's okay," I whispered, not meaning for it to be so silent when I said it. "I understand." Another lie.

"Maybe...," AJ's voice trailed off as he tapped his fingertips on the ledge. I watched his facial expression change into something I hadn't seen in a long time. This time, it's all because of me. "Maybe we should just leave the kissing and all that to the storyline."