After Ashes

Chapter One: Blade

Life as I knew it would never be the same again. My heart died with what was taken from me. I lay in bed and watched the shadows dance on the ceiling, created from the candle's light. I just couldn't believe it.

He couldn't be dead; the love of my life, my heart, and my better half. He was always there. For the past five years of our relationship, he never did me wrong, never lied and never stopped loving me. Now he wouldn't be there anymore. Suddenly he was gone. Not gone, I thought savagely, he was taken from me.

My heart broke all over again and fell to the pit of my stomach. Tears streaked hot paths down my face as I gripped my bed sheets. I screamed into the pillow to muffle the horrid cry that erupted from my lungs. I wanted the pain to stop. Everything within me was being torn to shreds. A part of me was dead.

Picking up my head, my lips met a bottle of whiskey. The more I sipped, the more my emotions faded into the burn of alcohol. I giggled out of hysterics as my feet led me off to the bathroom. My body felt possessed by what remained of my broken thoughts. Turning on the light, my eyes lingered on the mirror.

A girl stood there and I was staring into the shambles of my shattered heart. Her blue eyes, once a vivid blue, were a cold slate gray and hollow. Long brunette waves stuck to her flushed cheeks from tears and running black mascara. This was me? I parted my hair as the girl in the mirror did the same.

My chest tightened as her eyes darted as mine mimicked. I caught a glimpse of silver and slowly approached it. The blade was cool in my hand. A small smile crept to my lips and vision blurred.

Somehow my feet brought me back to my room. A slash was already dug into my arm, down to my wrist. My eyes soften to the crimson against the white of my pale skin. It only burned for a moment as the razor pressed down again. The quick silver glinted in the flames light, as a third cut was made, crossing over the first two gashes. I fell to my knees, holding my arms, blood freely pouring all over the floor and my lap.

The ache in my heart subsided and a part of me was at ease. Now, I won't be alone, was my last thought as I was cradled into unconsciousness.

I awoke to a vibrant streak of white as my eyes closed quickly. The murmuring of hushed voices were the only thing I heard. Something covered my mouth, forcing air into my lungs. Pricks tickled my left arm as I felt a needle drag through the skin, over and over again. I began to weep violently as I realized I was very much alive.

It wasn't suppose to end like this!

I had spent two months in the psychiatric ward before my forms for release were presented. My last visit to Dr. McKenzie was today, along with my freedom hanging in the balance. If I failed this evaluation, I could be stuck here longer than I liked. My mind did acknowledge a part of me was insane, but I didn't believe I was like the other patients here. They consisted mostly of sociopaths, people who were liable to kill on a whim, that were beyond the help of drugs and therapy. Then again, maybe I was no different, whether it was my life in question or not.

I began to sweat as I moved uncomfortably in the waiting room chair. I was early for my meeting. The wait didn't bother me as much as the smell in this place. It smelt of bleach, antiseptics along with the faint scent of something rotting. Maybe sanity, I grinned.

A chill lingered in the air, sending shivers down my spine, and my smile was gone instantly. My healing scars started to tingle and itch. The wrap may have been too tight, but I hadn't taken it off... Not willingly, at least. A nurse normally went through the trouble of dressing it and I never watched. I refused to look at the damage just yet.

The nurses and doctors here annoyed me with their exasperated sighs and disapproving eyes. No one had to tell me I was selfish. My own mother and father disowned me because of my actions. I had gotten a hold of a friend, to stay at his place for the remainder of the summer. He was partying it up in California till winter. At least I had a place to stay for the time being. That is if all went well today. I'm still going to be alone though...

Something shifted down the hall that brought my head up in full attention. My hairs stood on ends as I searched for a nurse or patient roaming the hallway. Nobody was in sight and the only noise heard was the overhead lights humming. Then my eyes caught a glimpse of one of the doorways in the hall. My heart jumped into my throat. Instead of a person emerging from the door, a shadow slid across the floor into another pool of shadows. It was to a closer room and crouched, perfectly, blended in the off black.

I gasped, bringing my knees to my chest. It began to advance towards me, merged in the hall's dark. I buried my face into my hands and took several deep breaths.

"Fuck, this isn't happening!" I muttered.

The air around me crackled and I squeezed my knees tighter.

"Adrina..." someone hissed near my ear.

No, no, no... I could feel the pressure build behind my eyes as I screamed internally.

"ADRINA!"

I screamed, jumping out of my seat, as a cold hand came down on my shoulder.

********Mwhahaha end chapter with a cliff hanger. :) The next chapter is already set but I want to see if people are actually going to read this... I want a commentor two.. =/ I don't ask for much really lol. And I'm sure this still needs editing even though I read it a million and one times.*********