As I sit quietly on the windowsill looking outside a hospital window, with my family sitting around the room and talking to my mother who was laying on the uncomfortable hospital bed wanting to leave the place she had to call home for the time she had left. We all insisted on staying by her side as much as we could on her final days. As a nurse walked, I heard someone in the room suggest we leave for the night and get some sleep and eat as mum needed some rest and most of us haven't eaten much, if anything, since before we got to the horrid hospital room early that morning. Everyone else said their quick goodbyes before I did so eventually it was down to me. I walked over to her quietly, placing a soft kiss on her cheek saying "I'll see you later mum" quietly, not really wanting to leave but wanting to at the same time.
"Why are you calling me mum Kirsty? I'm not your mum. I'm your sister"and she replied confused but certain I was her sister Kirsty my heart sank the moment I heard those words leave her mind. She remembered everyone except me... she remembered everyone else in the room but not her daughter. Her sister wasn't in the room. Kristy left days before she got transferred to this room. Before she got moved to the room that basically marks her last days, the room that essentially says "we've given up on treating her cancer so we're going to set her in this room as shes not getting any better"
I heard laughter from beside me. The last thing you'd want to hear when your mother has forgotten who you are. "That's not Kristy sweety that's Emily... your daughter" my grandmother replied still slightly laughing. I couldn't handle this. On the verge of tears listening to my mother and her mum arguing on who I was. I jumped slightly to the touch of my father's hand on my shoulder signalling it was time to go. As dad and i left the room, everyone followed. Except mum, the one person I'd want to leave with. The person everyone was there for.
We walked out of the hospital to the car. Only to drive over an hour and a half home, home we're all the memories were held. It wasn't much of a home without her though..
