The Notebook

Chapter 9

Warning, I showed this to my friend and she told me that some people will find this triggering so if you ever have body issues or you're easily triggered, please skip this.

Two sweaty bodies joined together in the dark room. Blue eyes flickered around as her fingers moved deeper inside. The black haired girl with chocolate brown eyes strained against the messy bed as she reached her high. Her hands were caressing the other girl's small breasts as she finally relaxed. She smiled at the girl, her face glowing. She then crawled towards the blue haired girl and straddled her. The room was filled with moans and musky smell.

Lily's POV
I woke up with a jolt, my eyes wandering towards the unfamiliar room.

"Ruby?" I called out but was answered with silence. I stared at the side of the bed and saw  no one beside me. Maybe everything was just a strange dream? Everything was so vivid, yet so blurry. I looked down and saw that I was still naked from the night before. Okay, that was a proof that it was not a dream. I ran my hand against my bird's nest of a hair and decided to stand up and start my morning. I stared at the bedside table and caught sight of a small clock. Crap, it's 1 o' clock in the afternoon. I sighed to myself. I saw a sticky note sticking up beside the side table and looked at a cute, curvy handwriting that was scribbled in it.

If you're looking for me, I'm downstairs with my friend. You're free to use the bathroom. There are clothes there as well and a toothbrush.

-Ruby.

I smiled slightly and took it from the wall. I saw my bag on the floor and picked it up. I then opened it and saw Ethan's journal. My smile disappeared and my hand unconsciously tightened on the bag. I took the notebook,letting my bag fall hastily on the floor, and opened it on a blank page. I stared at Ruby's note once again and then pasted it on the page. I had to ran my finger a couple of times on the post-it before successfully pasting it.

I then wandered around the big room until I saw the bathroom door. Upon opening it, I saw the clothes that she had lent me. It consisted of a plain red shirt and dark denim shorts. I also saw a pair of panties and a bra. I blushed at the thought that someone had already worn it before. However I cannot be picky can't I? Unless I want to be on commando.

I took a quick shower, brushed my teeth and wore the clothes Ruby had lent me.  Despite her being a fairly skinny girl, her clothes still dwarfed me. The thought of that cheered me a little bit. I looked at my face in the mirror and frowned. I am still too fat. I pinched at my sides and my frown became deeper as my fingers felt my flesh. I looked at my face and stared at the pimple mark just under my right eye. My hair will always be too thick and no matter how much I brush it,it would only continue being messy. They called me pretty, they called me thin but how come whenever they told me that I never believed them? How come when I look at myself in the mirror all I see is this ugly, pale, fat girl that will never be loved by anyone? How come no matter how much I skipped my meals, barf out the food I ate or exercised as hard as I could I still feel fat? I still feel ugly. I still feel alone.

Maybe I really did deserve to be violated by him. Maybe I should be grateful that he even did that to me. Maybe he was right, I should be grateful that I was even  touched especially since I was just an ugly piece of shit. I closed my eyes then looked around for release. When my eyes wondered to the toilet bowl, I quickly made my way towards it and opened it.

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

I am fat

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

I am fat

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

If I become thin He'll stop

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

Daddy, Stop

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

Daddy, I knew this was not a game

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

Please Daddy

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

PLEASE, PLEASE DADDY

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

I'LL BE GOOD DADDY

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

DADDY, I THINK MOMMY'S BACK

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

YES, DADDY, I WON'T TELL MOMMY SO PLEASEEEEE

STOP IT!!!!!

I need release.

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

I NEED release

Heave, Spit, Heave, Spit

I NEED RELEASE!!!!!

I rested the side of my head against the wall, waiting for the dizziness to subside. I then shakily stood up, flushed the toilet and splashed some water on my face. After I gargled some water and brushed my tongue with toothpaste, I composed myself and left the room to go downstairs.

Smile, Lily, Smile

I chanted over and over again as I descended down the stairs.

What I saw on the dining room sent me frozen on my tracks.

There was Ruby sitting on a chair glancing at me

and beside Ruby was

Her.

Sorry for the wait. I was really busy with class but I'll try to really finish this story and update more regularly. Thank you for the support.