Draco Malfoy: The great adventures of a great pussy

This story was inspired by all the pain and sufferings Draco Malfoy went through. He is a mere victim and I know what it's like to be hurt and confused---no actually I was just bored.

Yes, they are out of character but whatever.

*Please take note that I wrote this ages ago and I may have been sleep deprived and I must've eaten too much candies which will explain the absurdity  and not to mention, the terrible grammar of this fic. I may have also been, like, 12 years old when I wrote this so shut up. THOSE WERE DARK TIMES.

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“Zabini! Zabini! Blaise! Blaaaaaaise!”

Blaise shut his book with a sigh and looked up at the ballistic blonde.

“You look like a sex-crazed maniac…but then again, you are.” Blaise snickered.

“Hardee-har-har,” Draco smacked Blaise’s shoulder who continued roaring with laughter.

He immediately stopped laughing when Draco slid next to him on his bed. “Woah, dude, what are you doing!

“Merlin’s bloody balls. What the fuck are you doing, Draco?!” Blaise was torn between pushing Draco off the bed and jumping off the bed and out the window.

“Look, Draco, I love you like a brother and all but I don’t go that way. We can still be friends though…” Blaise shifted away from Draco who smacked Zabini’s shoulder again.

“I don’t go that way either, you prick.” Blaise relaxed a little but it still felt a bit weird to him.

“I find this, uhm, very uncomfortable.” Blaise said after the awkward silence that filled the room.

“Yes, well, I have a problem so shut up and be the best mate that you are and listen while I vent my heart out.” Draco hissed. “Because I have a feeling I’m going to cry, Blaise, cry! I’m a man, not a boy. I’m not supposed to cry!”

“Real men cry?” Blaise offered which earned him another smack in the shoulder.

“Crying is for pussies.”

 Sympathy for his best friend washed all over Blaise. He knew how hard Draco’s life was and he wanted to help his best mate.

“If this is all about your father’s death then let it all out, man. You’ll feel better.”

“Fa-what?” Draco looked at Blaise with a confused look who stared back with the same expression.

“It’s not about my dad. It’s about, uh, Granger…” Draco fidgeted with the hem of the blanket.

“Oh,” Blaise also fidgeted with the blanket’s hem.

“Dude, go fidget with something else. This is mine.”

“It’s my bed so it’s my blanket so bugger off.”

“Wanker.”

“Prat.”

“Ba-hey!” Draco smacked Blaise’s shoulder again. “Stop distracting me!”

“If you don’t stop smacking my shoulder, I will hex your balls off and you will rue the day you started smacking my shoulder.” Blaise threatened through gritted teeth while he rubbed his shoulder.

“The bruise on my shoulder is probably darker than The Dark Lord himself.” At that, they both stared at each other and started roaring with laughter.

“But he’s blue or grey or something." Draco said in between fits of laughter.

Blaise snorted. “I know!”