Love me once more

Chapter ten: In your arms, I want to be....

"Where are you?" It was the voice of a man. Ethan?, I thought. "Who is this?" I asked. "So you're just going to leave and even forget my name?" he asked. "Ethan?" I hesitated to say his name. He took a deep breath. "Where are you?" he asked. I looked around. "In my room.....oh! I went to visit my mom." I finally came to my senses and sat at the edge of my bed. "You could've told me." He seemed annoyed. "I wanted to, but you didn't show up or leave your number." I stood up and walked across the room and back. "You never asked." he said. I was shocked. "What? What do you mean, I never asked?" I nearly yelled into the phone. My blood began rushing, I felt my body heating up, but I didn't know why. "Why are you yelling? Ok, never mind, bye." Now he was clearly annoyed. "No! I mean, you should tell me where you are. I thought something happened to you." I slowly calmed down. It was silent on the other side, then a suddenly laughter. "Why would something happen to me?" He seemed amused, but now I was annoyed. "I mean it, Ethan. You remember last time?" I briefly reminded him, then he suddenly went silent. "That was an accident." he replied. I loved listening to his voice. "What did you do today?" I asked, hoping he would say a lot. "Nothing." was his answer. I took a deep breath and fell backwards unto my bed. "Ok, I'm going to bed now, bye." I said. "Hold on. Why are you rushing? I want to know how your day was." he replied. My face brightened up. I sat up and began telling him from my today's journey. We spoke all night until sun rise, but I wasn't tired. I enjoyed his voice, his laughter, his attention. "Your mom must be beautiful. How else would she have made you." I could imagine how big his smile was, when he said that. My mom knocked on the door. "I made you breakfast, so come down, lets eat together" she said through the door. I gently scratched my scalp. "Alright, i'll be down in a minute." I replied and took a deep breath. "I gotta go now. I'll just be staying at my mom's for a couple of days, don't worry. I'll call you later." I hung up and went down stares. My mom was already sitting at the table, biting a piece of her toast bread. "So, who is he? What's his name?" she asked, the moment I sat down. "No one." I replied and grabbed my tea cup. She quickly grabbed my cup and pulled it to her. "It better not be some junk, you picked up the street." her face went serious. I smiled. "His name is Ethan, a nice guy. He is tall, handsome, caring....what else?" She slowly placed my cup next to my hand. "How much does he earn? Can't be that much, living in that area." She stood up and went to the sink with her dish and began washing it. "Mom. I live there too." I replied. She suddenly turned around. "I know! That's why, I wish you could get back to your senses and come home. Warm food, warm home a warm bed." She took a piece of paper towel and wiped her hands. "I worked hard to get to this state of comfort. All in your name. Do you know, how hard it was to get to this point being a single mom? People talk, Ireena. People talk!" she took a deep breath. "I have warm food, mom. My apartment is warm too and yes, my bed is warm and comfortable. I just wanted to take a break and visit you. I'm fine." I stood up and went for a hug, but she turned around ad continued washing the dishes. "How is Reeva?" she asked. I went back to my seat and sat down. "Well...she is just Reeva." I replied and stuffed my mouth with a toast bread. "Your dad called." she said and stopped washing. I looked up. "He wants to meet you." she slowly turned around. "You can say 'no' if you don't want to." she smiled. I took a deep breath. "What do I have to loose, right?" I smiled. 

Throughout the day, I had my dad in my mind. The last time, I saw him, was at the playground, when he came to see me and another brief moment in my mom's kitchen at night. They were having an argument as always. What might've changed his mind now? I grabbed my phone and dialled his number. It rang for a brief moment, then the voice of a female"Hello?" I was shocked. I cleared my throat. "Hello? Am I speaking to Michael?" I asked. "No, this is his wife. Who are you?" My hands felt weak. "I'm....his daughter....Ireena." I nearly whispered. "Oh! You are that girl. Hold on a second, I'll get him for you." she replied. I battled with the thought of dropping the phone, but before I could, he picked up.  "Ireena?" his voice sounded happy. I faked a smile and replied. "Yes. It's me.....dad." I smiled. "Wow, your voice sounds all grown up too?" he laughed. I swallowed. "So, I was thinking of introducing you to your second family. What do you think?" he asked. I hesitated. "I would love to." I said. "That would be nice. So, how is your mom doing?" his voice suddenly sounded serious. "What time? And where?" I avoided his question. "Oh, ok how about tomorrow? All of us having dinner together at eight at Bob's dine?" he said. "Ok, I gotta go now." I quickly hung up and fell unto my bed. "It's hard isn't it?" my mom was leaning against the wall. I nodded.  

The next day, my mom and I had  been busy finding ways to cancel the dinner with my dad and his new family. "How about, you had to suddenly go back to work, after your boss had recently fired a worker? Like a....replacement?" my mom suggested. I shook my head. "That's too obvious mom." I replied while brushing my hair. "Alright, I'll be ready in a bit." She sighed and left my room. I smiled and took a rubber band and packed my hair in a bun. "Done." I said to myself. My mom rushed out of the house and I followed. "Let's get done and over with this, shall we." she sounded enthusiastic, while putting on a fake smile.  We arrived at the restaurant. My dad and his family arrived at the same time a we. He put on a big smile when he saw us and his wife waved. "Hi!" She seemed excited and came straight to hug my mom. "How are you?" she kissed the left then the right side of my mom's cheek. "You look amazing." my mom replied, putting an emphasis on 'amazing'. "Oh well. What can I say? I used to look better than this." she turned around and pointed at two young boys. "Those are Ian and Milo." she said. They came over, together with my dad. "Long time no see, Christen." my dad said and smiled. It felt awkward, but I tried to smile. "Ian and Milo, right?" I slightly bent over and smiled. "I'm Ireena."I said. "Well, this is my wife, Cassy." my dad said. "Shall we go and eat? Quite frankly, I'm starving." Cassy said and pointed at the restaurant." My mom nodded and began walking towards the entrance of the restaurant. I followed right behind her. 

We were sat at the best place in the restaurant and everyone's face had sunk into the menu, so was mine. However, I had been thinking of Ethan instead of deciding what to order. "So, how have you all been?" my dad asked. My mom and I slowly looked at each other. "Well....Ireena moved out..." she said and dug her face back into the menu. My dad looked shocked. "Wow...and you were ok with that?" He looked over to my mom, she barely looked at him and called the waiter. "Excuse me. Can I make my order?" she said to a waiter, who quickly made their way to our table. "Yes. What would you like to order?" a young man, the waiter, asked my mom. She smiled. "I would like to have Salmon Pasta and a bottle of your best red wine, thank you. Anyone else?" She looked satisfied. My dad didn't seem to have shaken off that topic, but he just began ordering. "I would like for a simple chicken soup for a starter, trout with risotto and tiramisu for dessert. Oh and your finest champagne ." He smiled and gave his menu to the waiter and looked over to Cassy. "Oh! Uhm...I would just like beef Lasagna please. And for these two, spaghetti bolognese with meatballs and orange juice." she too gave the menu to the waiter. I quickly picked the first option off the menu. "Uhm...for me the...Pepperoni Pizza with Mozzarella Cheese and Mushroom...and a glass of Coke. Thank you." I smiled and gave the waiter my menu. As the waiter had finally take our order and left, my dad turn to me. "So, what have you been up to lately, Ireena?" He asked. I cleared my throat and prepared to answer, when he suddenly continued. "I have heard from your mother, that you dropped out and moved out too? What was so much more important to you, that made you drop out a year before graduating?" he sounded very disappointed. "Could you not do this now?" my mom whispered. "No no. I absolutely must do this. In fact, did you consider even discussing it with me, Ireena?" I suddenly became angry. "I don't think you have any right to know about my life at all. You left mom and I, without saying a word, show up a few years later, claiming to be a very successful man with two son and a wife and then have the audacity to treat us like...like.....like some form of low-lives? Know your place!" I stood up, took a deep breathe, ready to leave the table, when my mom quickly grabbed my arm and gently pulled m back down. "He said goodbye. I was the one who didn't want him to be around you and I'm sorry." my mom said, slowly letting go of my arm. I suddenly felt tears pouring down my cheeks. "I need to use the bathroom." I said and left to find the bathroom. 

I stood in front of the mirror, desperately trying to calm myself down while watching myself cry at the same time. My mom entered and slowly walked towards me. "I'm so sorry." she whispered. I quickly bent over and began washing my face with water. "I should've refused to meet him, if I would've known what an a-hole he is." she stopped behind me and gently rubbed my back. I slowly straightened my back, letting the water drop down my face unto my neck. "Why are you still defending him?" I asked. She took a deep breath. "Ireena....it's complicated." She took a deep breathe and looked at the mirror. "Your father and I just didn't connect. I was so...unhappy and....and things went too fast. I met him, and moments later I had you...We were young and dump...I suppose. I'm so sorry hun. I..." her eyes began watering. I pulled her closer and pressed her tight against me. "Let's just go home mom." I whispered. She slowly pat my back. "Ok, let's go."